NHS to investigate new sleeplessness drug called Cleggahypnol after whole hotel full of people fall in deep slumber. Fuck me but this man is a boring cunt. Hm armed Forces to deploy Cleggscreen against insurreection, send enemy on fuicking come. Jesus fucking wept. Thought LibDems couldn't get no worse after leaders from Corpse U Like ltd, but this fucking bloke is amazing.
2:54 PM, December 18, 2007
Anonymous stanislav said...
Sorry, typos; insurrection, send enemy in fucking coma.
Struggling to stay awake after 90 seconds exposure to Cleggscreen weapon
2:57 PM, December 18, 2007
stanislav, a young polish plumber said...
Well, David, I'd just like to say I agree with everyone else on the panel. (Simon Hughes,Bi- not Gay, every other week) We are all very clever here, otherwise we would not be here, talking to all the teachers and retired, vengeful probation officers out there in Radio Four land. Some of whom even phone up on Saturday, like anyone gave a fuck about their spluttering indignation. But what I would say, David, if I may, is that those of us who stroll, nightly, our cocks hanging out, on Hampstead Heath, avoiding Matthew Parris and David Starkey and Lord Linley, are a bit fed up of all this homogenised smoothness and are longing for a big black Rastaman of a politician to come into our political lives and give us a good beating and a very sore arse, mmmm. Minority rights. It's why I joined the Liberal Democrats. I mean, I would just ask the studio audience, only here to clap when instructed, why should it only be Ron Badgerman and Kevin Spacey who get all the rough trade around here?
Yes, quite, says Dimbleby Minor, I know its in no way scientific but would those who agree with Mr Hughes -that Nick Clegg should be hanged, to the tune of It Shoulda Been Me, by Ms Lorraine Ellerman - just get your cocks out and wave them around a bit. Well, there you are, for listeners at home, who can't see, that result, I stress not scientific or representative, a bit like a Scotch election result, overwhelmingly endorses Mrs Hughes' view that Nick Clegg is a cunt.
What, Yasmin Alibhai Meringue Pie, is your take on this? And, before you start, everybody, the dogs in the street, knows that you are a moslem woman, a dumpy, mouthy suet pudding, all hairy armpits, stubby fingers dipped in garlic and stinking of roast goat and almonds, holes in your tights, babbling about your son the barrister and so on.
Well, David, as a moslem women I would just like to say that we are all one before God, except that thieving black bastard Mr Jasper. You know, in my constituency, Notting Hill and Broadcasting House, people are absolutely fed-up with jumped-up nigger bandits like him giving law-abiding British Ayrabs like us a bad name. Bismillah, No, we will not let him go, will not let him, will not let him , will not let him, will not let him, will not let him go, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. But of course everyone is equal in the eyes of Allah, peace and blessings on everyone who buys the paper I write for. Inshallah and Salaam to license-payers for this most welcome bit of bunce. Did I mention that my son is a Barrister and I am very proud of him. There's far too much talking about racial difference I always say, as a moslem woman. As for the Liberal democrats, which was the main thrust of the questioner's, well, question, the answer is, who gives a flying fuck. Was Mr Oaten at the victory celebration, or is a shit eater no longer considered home secretary in waiting, it's so hard to keep up; there's a new LibDem party every coupla years, disaster after fucking disaster, coming back with some old tripe. Fuck 'em, David, 'swhat I say.
stanislav said...
Dear Mr RDS
Right, the Paxman-Clegg interview illuminated the modern political autocracy. Even though we know better, we will do you the courtesy of listening to your complaints. And then fuck you up the arse anyway.
The other thing, and it was both tiny and huge: his first words after the result, his very first words were: My election as leader....change....change etc and NOT, despite his slender majority, thanks to Chris, or thanks to Vince, but straight in, Me Me Me.
Most interesting thing about NewsWank was that there is much better comment on here (usually) than among those three clowns, the drunken ginger bint, the Fink and that other cunt with the warts on his neck.
stanislav said...
Dennis
You and Lady Jane and others are too kind; the order-order blog, the blogosphere itself, is work of many, not least of GF himself. Great Polish anarchist Saint Augustine preached: what else is righteous anger, but the word of God? The blogworld gives voice to many, whom the slags in parliament, newspaper proprietors, poxed-up columnists, and the fucking unspeakable BBC would suppress.
Worlds, they rise and fall; stars, they glow and fade; but is true, the need for plumber remain.
Otherwise everybody up to their neck in shit, innit?
ps Dennis, LJ, EK, TT, AJ, Casandra, Woman on Raft, Man in shed,Man in shitbag, Man on bus, Julian, MM, rds, 45, GF and all other friends:
Almost at the end of the thread of the last cartoon - Gordon falling to bits- is a tour de force from:
DEBBIE, PA TO MR SCREWTAPE.
Is written in style of other bloke, a pastiche, innit. Is a warning that, just like everybody says on the Today programme - the Devil, as ever, is in the detail. It is a very rewarding five minutes. Although scare shit from plumber. It was posted at:
11.56 pm DECEMBER 17th
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