tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11422202463782968862024-03-13T05:06:43.978-04:00Stanislav's RantsStanislav's Rants on Guido (www.order-order.com) plus whatever else tickles my fancy.Plumbers Assistanthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02799830542818857679noreply@blogger.comBlogger273125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1142220246378296886.post-72423606335482842762008-07-22T19:11:00.001-04:002008-07-22T19:13:16.321-04:00stanislav, a young polish plumber said... LATE NEWS<span style="font-weight: bold;"><br /><br />stanislav, a young polish plumber said... </span> <p>LATE NEWS<br /><br />On his fund-raising tour of the Middle East, UK prime minister Gordon ben Brown addressed the Knesset. From The Jerusalem Herald and the Tel Aviv Daily Mirror.(ed. Toilets Maguirestein)<br /><br />"My fellow Hebes and motherfuckers, as a son of the Scotch synagogue I say to you Shalom and thank you all for inviting me to preach in your parliament and borrow some money.<br /><br />You have always been most accommodating in this area, especially in the Twelfth century back home in York, although I believe there was a bit of a communication difficulty in the easy repayments plan.<br /><br />If Labour had been in charge then I would of course have taken the Hebe moneylenders into public ownership and only driven them into the sea as a very last resort - or if they refused a reasonable offer of work, down at the job centre, as we are now proposing to do in our own Final Solution.<br /><br />The poor and the workshy deny lebensraum to the very hard-working and relatively poorly-paid wealth creators in the banks, the Party and the non tax-paying Russian underworld.<br /><br />It is my policy, which I am sure you will all support, that we have eine Reich, eine Volk in which the poor, if they can no longer work for the rich or pay taxes, become worthless, so into the sea they must go; it is what we in the Party call compassionate Nazism. A bit like you with the neighbours up in Lebanon.<br /><br />Y'know, when I was a wee boy my father was a Scotch Rabbi and so I am very much a Hebe motherfucker myself. And proud of it, only not in Palestine of course. Or South America. And I scarcely mention it with Frau Merkel. Not that I have anything to do with Germans.<br /><br />In Scotland we didn't have the windows broken and the Swastika daubed on the walls thing but apart from that it was all quite Yiddish. Only we call it Presbyterianish. And instead of chicken soup our mommas made us nutritious and tasty chocolate bars fried in batter, a bit like Gefelte Fish. Only quite different<br /><br />There is no God but God and Mohammed is his prophet, as our Muslim friends say, not that we have any Muslim friends making oil in Saudi Arabia. And yes, my fellow Hebe motherfuckers, I do solemnly commit my armed forces to going in there in Iran or wherever, in their rusty old LandRovers; I mean, of course, trusty old LandRovers just as soon as a) you give me some money, only not through Mr Abrahams this time and b) we borrow some ammunition off Uncle Sam.<br /><br />This offer of course depends on enough of them surviving the best efforts of the schwartzer goyim untermenschen in Afghanistan and them all not coming home in tastefully flag-draped coffins and sombre music to Brize Norton and giving me an arseache in the fucking coroner's office.<br /><br />As a way of recognising my own Hebeness and the very great debt we shall all owe you once you give me the money I propose to bring into government, alongside Obedience minister, Mr Jack Torture, the right honourable member for Tel Aviv, Mr Gerald Boys-Kauffman and the noble Lord Janner-Holocaust.<br /><br />And if it moves the deal along a bit we could have a Holocaust Day not just once a year but once a week, maybe sing: On the Twelve Holocaust Days of Christmas, my true love (Ed) sent to me.....etc or even hold it daily, along with the citizenship obedience prayer.<br /><br />In fact I could re-name the whole fucking country Holocast Island, make everybody wear skullcaps and eat anchovy sandwiches on that shit famine bread you like so much.<br /><br />It is the run up to the Olympic Games, just now, and people all over the world ask me about the security implications, might terrorists take hostages and even kill them? Right load of bollocks is what I say, such a thing would never happen. It's like saying there will be a return to Tory boom and bust which there won't be even though there is. And in England, anyway, we can rely upon the Chinese Secret Service, who have allowed me to put them in charge of the Metropolitan police, under, of course, our magnificently uniformed Commissionaire, Sir Iain Bendover and our security minister, Admiral Lord Liberace-West and. Just for once, lets never mind what it says in the Good Book about sodomites and fire and fucking brimstone; if you fucking please, some, even most, perhaps all of my best friends are arse burglars.(Ed)<br /><br />The former Chief Rabbi of the Northern Ireland Hebes, Archbishop Professor the Right Reverend Lord ben Paisley of Shankill Road ButchersRus, has recently resigned his office; with his many doctorates - all of them properly purchased and invoiced from the University of eBay - and his own private synagogue, his most sticky-fingered Reverence Doctor Iain and his son, Dr Iain the Second, have shown the Ulster Hebes how to do business in a modern plutocracy and we shall not look on his like again, Oi vay, although his fellow architect of Peace Through Torture, Mr Martin Kneecaps does have an engaging twinkle in his roguish eye and I am sure a few of us here wouldn't mind getting tied-up with him.<br /><br />My prudent stewardship of the UK economy - burning all the money- has set us fair for weathering the shitstorm which I have created. I have instructed the British people to both borrow and spend like there's no tomorrow and to, at the same time. save every penny because there is an all too real tomorrow in which they will all have no pensions, not from the state, because I have aforementionedly, Mr Deputy Rabbi, burned all the money and not from the private sector because the directors have used all that money to pay themselves bonuses in order to attract the right kind of people.<br /><br />A simple, prudent strategy, inflate the only asset which people have, encourage them to borrow and spend it in the High Street creating a false boom and when the artificially high value of the asset deflates, everybody gets fucked up the Khyber. It's called my no more boom and bust strategy and it has woked very well. Up until now.<br /><br />My prudence will also have the effect of stimulating the pawnbroking sector of the economy, probably the only sector I have not single-handedly abolished.<br /><br />What about the future, people ask. Well, my Hebe motherfucking brethren in Christ, as a way of burning any future money that people don't yet have their hands on. I have prudently written massive sums of future PFI debt down in the back of my rough book, where no-one can see them. This means that they won't have to be paid back until long after I am dead and up in Heaven with my father and all the other Rabbis.<br /><br />It just goes to show that we in the UK have worked out how to deal not only with the economy, which is why I am here with the begging bowl, but also with with the terrorist threat, you just let 'em all out of jail and put them in government, whilst simultaneously prudently burning all the money.<br /><br />You can still learn a lot from us, even though you have bought the Labour Party outright, just think how much better and more inclusive it would have been if instead of executing Mr Eichmann you had made him deputy prime minister, like we do. Murdering psychobastards can make surprisingly effective political campaigners. As I don't need to remind you.<br /><br />I look forward to a positive response to our loan application and assure you that your money, like ours, will soon go up in smoke and you will never be troubled by seeing it again. But then you're used to that.<br /><br />I will close now, my fellow Hebe motherfuckers, with an old Yiddish song we used to sing at Highland Bar Mitvahs:<br /><br />Al-laaahhh Akhbar, Al-laaahhh Akhbar, Bismillah, No we will not let them go, not for forty-two days, No no no no no no no, All the lassies say Och, Aye, Donald where's yer foreskin ?<br /><br />Thank you, thank you, no business like showbusiness. Cheques or cash will do. But preferably cash. Thank you. Shalom! Heil Hitler! And have a negilah day."<br /><br />(Silence.)</p> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 22, 2008 4:06 PM</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(136, 136, 136);"><br /></span>Plumbers Assistanthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02799830542818857679noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1142220246378296886.post-90826653708403149552008-07-09T19:48:00.001-04:002008-07-09T19:48:04.057-04:00stanislav, a young polish plumber said... Do you have, Ms Harman, a last request ?<div xmlns='http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml'><a href='http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/jump-on-harriet-bandwagon.html'>Guy Fawkes' blog of parliamentary plots, rumours and conspiracy: Jump on the Harriet Bandwagon</a><br/><blockquote><b>stanislav, a young polish plumber said...<br/></b><br/> Dear Mr Scott Redding<br/><br/> You are absolutely right, these are vile and sexist remarks; they don't, however, on a scale of bad behaviour, come anywhere near having one of Mr Hoon's Democratic Fragmentation munitions land in yourlocal infants school and eviscerate your children; they do not compare with being held hooded, naked and being sexually assaulted by GI Joan and her Alsatians; they are not in the same league as six years illegal detention and torture by CIA psychobastard momma's boys down in sunny Cuba and they breach fewer common law and constitutional provisions than do any number of fascistic measures enacted by Harman's party; these remarks, to which you object, in short, do not result in mass murder, gang rape, illegal detention and torture, all of which are the hallmarks of the achingly politically correct gang of parasites in which Harman and Partner are so prominent.<br/><br/> The Blair/Brown government, aside from its chronic mishandling of the economy and public sector reform has allied us to a vicious, reactionary gangster cabal in Washington and imported to the United Kingdom a similar politics - one of suborned, complicit media, massive bribes, money-laundering and blackmail, all applied in concert with the trampling of rights far outside their parliamentary remit. How, pray, do you suggest we address and refer to people such as these, the tyrant Harman et al?<br/><br/> My own preference and I am sure that of many - aside, of course, from those still convinced of the imminent discovery of Iraqi weapons of mass destruction - would be for an occasion on which to deploy a simple phrase: Do you have, Ms Harman, a last request ?<br/><br/><br/> love from stanislav<br/><br/> <b>July 9, 2008 2:34 PM </b></blockquote></div>Plumbers Assistanthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02799830542818857679noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1142220246378296886.post-50755096175481661972008-07-07T12:26:00.000-04:002008-07-07T12:26:00.216-04:00stanislav said... Here is the Stabbing Round-up<a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/marr-gets-all-aggressive.html">Guy Fawkes' blog of parliamentary plots, rumours and conspiracy: Marr Gets All Aggressive</a><br /><blockquote><b>stanislav said...<br /><br /> Here is the Stabbing Round-up</b><br /><br /> FROM THE OFFICE OF SOCRATES JOHNSON-SINGH, MAYOR OF LONDON:<br /><br />Well it is a jolly rum do, all this knife crime thingy. But I jolly well dunno what they expect me to do about it. I'm not really Socrates, just enjoy a kebab now and again, after a skinful. Maybe I should appoint some more mouthy, bent, black perverts. As a token thingy. Gone now, anyway; line in the old sand, learn valuable lessons, move forward. Enquiry cancelled.<br /><br />Instead of stabbing each other, can't these people just rampage through the town in evening dress, smash the place up, frighten the locals and get Daddy to pay the bill, like we used to; go to coke parties with their old university chums, y'know, do a spot of insider dealing, try-out some other cove's bitch; engage in a bout of the old flagrante delicto in the back of the Bentley, what ? It's not as though we don't set them a good example. Cocaine? Never touched it.<br /><br /> IN THE HOUSE the shadow leader of the Tory party, Kid Hague, is on his feet:<br /><br />Ay ay ay funny thing happened to me on the way to the house, Madam Deputy Spunker (cheers) but then, perhaps, perhaps Madam Deputy Spanker, honourable and right members will forgive me if I keep that little apercu for my paying customers (groans of disappointment from all sides.)<br /><br />As, Madam Deputy Splasher, for these truly dreadful events, whatever they are, I was only saying to Lord Sebastian in the shower this morning, all this stabbing, y'know, it'll have to stop, but he wouldn't be told, naughty boy. It's not as though we, in this place, don't set people a good example<br /><br />FOR THE GOVERNMENT, Stabbing Minister, Tony McNutter said; I will be responding to people's very real, very real, um, things, Mr Spunker, as ever, by passing new freedoms legislation which the government has already voted on and we will, therefore, not need to detain members who can just get on with their property portfolios, their shopping trips to Mr Lewis's and, as the right honourable member for Richmond has just indicated, their boyfriends.<br /><br />The thrust of the legislation - The Do As You're Fucking Told, Citizen, (Temporary but Permanent powers) Act - is a return to the founding principles of both my own party and, indeed, all political parties.<br /><br />As of now, Mr Spunker, any voter who doesn't do as they are told by anyone acting on my behalf will be shot, their assets forfeit to the Exchequer and their family sent for re-education. (Cheers, waving of papers.)<br /><br />ON BBC's THIS WEEK PROGRAMME Andy Slaphead Jock, Murdoch multi-millionaire and pretend journalist, sits shoulders hunched-up, like a Hibernian hobgoblin, informally tieless, if not wigless, holding his postcards, smirking, as well he might:<br /><br />Diane, you know some poor black people, don't you, do they smell frightfully bad ? I mean, aren't poor people dreadful ? Whats your take (1960s slang = opinion) on this ?<br /><br />DIANE LARD, pretend MP (from inside a billowing black tent.) Well, Andrew (waving arms around) I blame the parents; as you know, I was so conscientious a parent that I sent my precious little baby to an expensive, fee-paying, radical socialist school, in order, purely, you understand, to keep him from harm's way, out of reach of my constituents' grubby children and not to give him any advantage in later life, like when he inherits my seat.<br /><br />So my conscience on this matter, as in all others, is clear. As for the trash and riff-raff in my constituency, well if they can't be bothered to get the very best for their children well, why should I care, not as though I'm paid to represent them or anything. It's not as though I don't set them a good example.<br /><br /> (turning, smiling acidly) Michael, you should know, does Barack Obama have a big one ?<br /><br />DAME MICHAEL PORTILLO, MURDOCH EMPLOYEE AND FAMOUS COWARD: Indeed, and you make my point, Diane, some of these black chaps have whoppers, as Ron Davies often remarked, when he was Badgers Secretary; it beats me why we can't find jobs for some of them, lots of them, down at the House; why, even some of the female members might find use for a well-developed young ree-surch assistant, although my instinct tells me that they'd be gobbled up, so to speak, by the gentlemen members. You might try one yourself, Andrew, if you ever tire of totty young enough to be your granddaughter. Are we going to be singing Gimme, Gimme, Gimme a Man After Midnight again this week, Andrew, I do hope so.<br /><br />JOCK NEIL: No, we're not, and that's enough of poor people, let them stab each other to death if they want, now it's time for that giant of political commentary, Peter Stringfellow and HIS take of the week.<br /><br />And don't go away because later on we have some other facetious, self-aggrandising, celebrity fuckwit I met at a do the other night, I think it's that bald, angry bloke, the pretend soldier, Kemp, another chum of my friend, but not yours, Rupert. Ross will be telling us how they deal with knife crime in the SAS. Which he isn't in.<br /><br /> But don't blame us at This Week for all these stabbings, it's not as though we don't set a good example.<br /><br /> FROM THE OFFICE OF THE CROWN PROSECUTOR, SIR KEN McFREEMASON:<br /><br />In view of the appalling number of poor people stabbing one another to death, we rich lawyers have decided that it would be a waste of scarce resources to prosecute our worshipful brethren in the houses of parliament, the police, the civil service, the BMA and elsewhere, not that we do.<br /><br />I have decided, therefore, to amend the Misrepresentation of The People Act, so that henceforth, it is in the public interest that no members, past or present, of these groups may be prosecuted for anything whatsoever, up to and including procuring, prostitution, racketeering, blackmail, money-laundering, extortion, murder and war crimes. Even though they have all done them.<br /><br />This step merely formalises the existing custom and I feel that it will meet with wide approval. Among those, at any rate, who gave me my job and will give me my retirement peerage, pensions and QUANGO posts.<br /><br />This fair and even-handed, fearless application of the legal process is bound to restore confidence among those who thought that laws they had made against other people might be unfairly used against themselves.<br /><br />Now that politicians are free once more to carry on regardless of the law I am confident that all this knife business will just go away, not that anyone important cares about it; rather useful actually, never too young to be an Enemy Within.<br /><br />It is in this exemplary and impartial execution of my duties that I demonstrate to poor people that I am doing my best to set them a good example.<br /><br /> More stabbing news on the hour, here on Sky with Kay Hatchet. For updates to your mobile, text STAB to news@sky.com<br /><br /> <b>July 7, 2008 12:26 PM </b></blockquote>Plumbers Assistanthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02799830542818857679noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1142220246378296886.post-86183451346982226352008-07-04T14:39:00.001-04:002008-07-04T14:39:24.326-04:00stanislav, a young polish plumber said...The anonymati, eh, what are they like ?<div xmlns='http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml'><a href='http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/troughing-ministers-troughing-mps.html'>Guy Fawkes' blog of parliamentary plots, rumours and conspiracy: Troughing Ministers, Troughing Tory MPs</a><br/><blockquote><b>stanislav, a young polish plumber said...</b><br/><br/> Dear Mr Goodnight Vienna<br/><br/> The anonymati, eh, what are they like ?<br/><br/> Mind you, was a bloke here, the other night, some kinda internet welfare worker, said he was "interested in discussing things with intelligent and non-racist readers of this blog" MixTogether, he called himself.<br/><br/> Wouldn't claim to have either of the necessary qualities to a relationship with this person, being just a plumber and all but I was interested in telling him to go and join the football team banging his mother on a block booking, she'd be able to find room for him.<br/><br/> It's the pretension you see, the assumptions, both of them stupid and racist, that if you say intelligent and non-racist it means that you are both of these things and able to detect them in others and that you can form a group together and sit around being those things and hey, fuck me, before you know it, whole fucking world, by osmosis, is them, too, intelligent and non-racist, these are the sort of people who carry the Guardian in public, but the fact is that anybody who would utter such tripe is obviously both of these things himself, or maybe herself.<br/><br/> See, Mr or Ms MoxTogether, if you only talk to people whom you think agree with you, you might just as well stick your head way down between your legs and whistle up your arse.<br/><br/> This observation, of course, on the democratic necessity of the collision of opposing ideas should not be in any way taken as approval of Mr Fucking Delicious, our in-house mutant.<br/><br/> ps It is an axiom worth remembering that - given the tyranny and bestiality which is, increasingly, ever abroad - it is better, unquestionably, to have a gun and not need one, than need one and not have one. Innit?<br/><br/><br/> <b>July 4, 2008 6:42 PM </b></blockquote></div>Plumbers Assistanthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02799830542818857679noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1142220246378296886.post-70760525037591526522008-07-04T14:29:00.001-04:002008-07-04T14:29:45.646-04:00stanislav said...State of the Limey Nation Address.<div xmlns='http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml'><a href='http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/troughing-ministers-troughing-mps.html'>Guy Fawkes' blog of parliamentary plots, rumours and conspiracy: Troughing Ministers, Troughing Tory MPs</a><br/><blockquote><b>stanislav said...</b><br/><br/> <b>From CBS, NBC, CNN, ABC and that cunt Murdoch's pretend news channel.<br/><br/> State of the Limey Nation Address.<br/><br/> "Mah Fellow Motherfuckers</b><br/><br/> President Codger McCain here tonight to shoot the fat a little, chew the breeze, right here, fronta the fire with m'dog, Obama, just like my illustrious predecessor in this great office, president whoosis, used to do, y'all know who I mean, the little fat fuck who took over when the other one croaked, the one in the hat, the one who nuked the Nips to Hell and back, slimy little yellow bastards, President Codger McCain'd a bombed every last fucking one of them grunting little monkeys, and their fucking Emperor Horseshit, right back to their rice-munching, head-chopping fucking ancestors, glassed the whole fucking place right over.<br/><br/> All got way too many teeth, ever notice that, mah fellow motherfuckers, how them slopes all got a few too many teeth ? No, I guess not but it's the kinda thing a Commander in Chief needs to know about before he has some sonsa fuckin' bitches blown into next fuckin' week. It's frankly unfuckingAmerican, number a teeth them little bastards got. No wonder they can't talk right., like decent white Christian folks. Eat with fuckin' twigs, they do, probably can't get a knife and fork past all them fuckin' teeth. Obama! get yer fuckin' nose outa that woman's ass, I told ya before, next time I'll take you out on the White House lawn and blow yer Goddamned head off; got m'gun, right here in my pants, next to my catheter. Sorry about that folks, now, where in the Hell was I ?<br/><br/> Yeah right. Foreign policy stuff. No easy way to say this, what with the special relationship and everything, but the Limey President, he's an honest ta fucking Jesus shit-fer-brains fruitcake, a twenty-four fuckin' carat psycho and I am not, mah fellow motherfuckers, bullshittin' yer asses, man's madder'n a grizzly with his dick caught in a trap, running around all over the woods, biting hisself. Been over there in London England myself, met him right up close and I have to tell y'all that that's one mad Limey. And his breath, sonofa fuckin bitch, it smells like the fucking aircon went off down at the morgue, go in a room with the Limey President's like sticking yer head up Satan's asshole. He leaves the meeting every five minutes to go an jerk himself off, y'know, no I'm not shitting ya, comes back in squirming and stuttering, his lower jaw jerking up and down like a fiddler's fuckin' elbow; guy over there, Polack plumber, got a whole new terminology for it.<br/><br/> Y'know, on the tee-vee, everytime I see that Goddamned jaw manouevre, that gulping, I swear to Goda-fuckingMighty that that dude 's got somebody's fist up his Goddamn asshole; right there, on the fuckin' tee-vee, there's someone, under the fuckin' table, behind the fuckin' chair, got their Goddamned fist up the Limey President's asshole.<br/><br/> Goes on the tee-vee, right there plumb in the middlea the Limey Congress, sits there eatin' snot right out a his fucking nose, like a four year old. Right there on the Goddamned tee-vee. I ever see that fuckin' heathen ass-fistin', snot-eatin', jerk-off sonofabitch here in my Oval Office take him right out there on the White House lawn and blow his fuckin' head off, see what he makes a them values; got m'gun, right here in my pants, next my catheter.<br/><br/> Y'know, he came down offa that reservation up at the top of England Britain where they keep the drunks and mental patient folks, all the transwotsanames, the dwarves, all those kinda freaks, web-foots, six-finger, inbred, albino, ginger bastard motherfucking mutant sonsafuckinbitches; got 'em all behind a big wall up there and just throw some money over the top now and again, let 'em elect their own mutant in chief, just like regular people, only these mothers are all a million fucking years and a good few evolutionary developments offa being regular; live in fuckin' caves, mosta them, eat porridge with their fingers, worse than fuckin' Nips, seen it with my own eyes, it's like Limey Mexico, and he came down with that other pansy, the one with the freakshow wife, Jesus H fucking Christ, d'ya ever see a kisser like that ? Park a fucking Humvee in there. Imelda her name is, seems like Uncle Sam is buying her a new house every fucking goddamned fucking week, ugly bitch got more palaces than Saddam fucking Hussein.<br/><br/> Anyway, they all come down off the reservation and take over the Limey Communist Party. Get some oily fag cocksucker off the tee-vee, Mandelstein, or something, a walking sperm bank, sucking everybody's dick, they're all coked-up faggots in the BBC Limey media, the ones that ain't kiddy-fiddlers, and next thing you know the pansy and Imelda are in Buckingham House running the whole fucking joint, selling off seats in the Limey Senate like they was hamburgers and this joker, the one-eyed freak, is at the Limey Treasury burning all the country's fucking money in a great big bonfire.<br/><br/> The Limey Congress is full a dingleberries, see, never done a day's fucking work in their Goddamned communiist lives, Ree-Surchers, mostly, attorneys some of them, even fuckin' worse, and every commie sonofabitch is dancing round the money bonfire cheering their fuckin' heads off as the whole fuckin' country goes up in smoke.<br/><br/> Anyhow, after ten fuckin' years the pansy realises he's been rumbled and heads off to be a Cardinal for ole Pope Nazi while Imelda is gangbanging her way around the world for money, like she was Jackie fucking Onassis, banging like an Iowa shithouse door in a gale, and up steps the current guy, Gordon, off the Reservation.<br/><br/> And it was all shit, he says, on the street outside 10 Buckingham House, holding hands with his Bearded Lady, everything we done this past ten years, all shit, all of it, shit. I'm going in here right now and let the work of change begin, change all that shit into wine, like he was Charlton fuckin' Heston talking to the fuckin' Israelites. There's no need to elect me, he said, my daddy said I should be Limey President, and that should be enough. I'm going in here now and work night and fucking day and change everything about again. Just as soon as folks see how clever I am, they all gonna want me for Life President's what he says, but first I just gotta make sure all the money gets burnt to fuckin' soot and ashes.<br/><br/><br/> Now, my fellow motherfuckers, Limeyland is one weird joint. Here in the US of A, if you if you go a thousand miles from home and go out to a swingers party, y'know, watch some other dude porkstick yer old lady, and leave yer kids all alone in the dark to be carried away by the raggle taggle gypsies-O or some other kinda bestial ethnic minority groupa worthless un American bastards, you might expect to spend some time on the County Farm, gettin' yer ass kicked but over there in Limeyland they pay off yer fuckin' mortgage for ya and open ya up a huge fuckin' bank account and put your brother in charge of it and the Limey government gives you a spokesman of your own. Get to go on the teevee every day just like a regular motherfucker, instead a gettin' fuckin' stones thrown at ya, like you should.<br/><br/> So it's no surprise to this old warrior that the Communist Limey press corp bought right in to that change shit, off Assman, the Scotch Limey, the idea was that this certifiable fuckin lunatic with voices in his head and hands up his ass who burnt all the fuckin' money should be put in charge of the entire sorry-assed, pussy-whipped country, without so much as an election, but just a promise that the fistin' screwball was gonna pay even closer attention to the spirit messages he received from his late old man, some kind of a Reservation Jehovah's fuckin' Witness, had his own church and everything. and that's just exactly what happened.<br/><br/> Anybody says, Hold on a Goddamn fucking minute, why are you burning all the money and giving the gold away and Assman just says some shit about right long-term decisions for hard-working Limey families and Bob's yer fuckin' uncle. And, my fellow motherfuckers, it is this loser's handling of the Limey money -Prudently Burning all the fuckin' Money and giving away all the gold down there in PoundLand - that caused this whole fuck-up in the subprime market here at home in the US. Messages from the fuckin' dead. That and selling Limeyland into a Communist Federation with a load of fucking European thieves, faggots, cocksuckers and opera-loving, shit-eating motherfuckers.<br/><br/><br/> The whole place is fucked. Limeyland, birthpace of the Pilgrim Fathers, fucked by sodomitin' Scotch lunatics.<br/><br/> The Gay Truckers Association is blockading Assman right there in Buckingham House, even now, those faggots got blood in their eyes and fried egg down their vests, want free gas and all those toilets put back in the highway laybys, is what they want. The Limey Congressmen're makin' it legal for themselves to rob the store until t's fuckin' empty. Back up on the reservation his own tribesmen hate his sorry fisted guts and he daren't even go back there without a full regiment of secret service to protect his ass. Got a dwarf in charge up there, on the reservation, keeps his old lady's corpse in the attic an' drinks his own piss. The communist labour unions won't give him another nickel. The Limey cops hate him, the teachers hate him , the nurses hate him, nothing works, the economy's fucked, the weather's fucked, the roads are fucked, you can't go in a Limey hospital without catching some Goddamned filthy disease because the thieving bastard Limey doctors are all too far up their own asses to wash their fuckin' hands, the schools are fucked, the little bastards running arund stabbing each other; come Fall and all the old Limeys're set to freeze to fucking death, or starve or both, if the little bastards don't get 'em first. The police'll plug ya fulla holes soon as fucking look at you; they got cameras in everybody's fucking house, they can just hoist ya off the street and toss yer ass in the slammer and everything you care to mention is shit. If waht thy're doin' is against the law they just gor ight ahead and make up some new laws, just like that, Y'all can go and kiss my ass, Mr Voter, that's what them Limey cocksuckng Congressmen say. Assman couldn't win a fucking election in his own front room if he was the only candidate. The Leader of the Limey Republicans is a two-faced, two-bit card-sharping shit-fer-brains Momma's boy; Archbishop Canterburg, the Limey Pope, is a fucking nutcase, couldn't find the hole in his own ass, next King of LimeyLand thinks he's a fucking sanitary towel, most of the Limey Congress is under investigation for fraud, Limey currency soon won't be worth no more'n a Zimbabwe dollar, and the whole shithole is under fuckin' water most of the time.<br/><br/> Snotman's up to his neck in shit and every five fuckin' minutes seems like a turd as big as USS New Jersey comes steaming over the horizon. Just as well they only got a few payclerks and gravediggers hiding in the airport, out there in Eyerack. Wouldn't want the crazy fag Limey cocksucking premier giving orders to proper military.<br/><br/> Talkin' a which, mah fellow motherfuckers, here is my solemn promise to y'all - I find any man in my army sticking his dick up another soldiers's asshole an I'll shoot 'em both, right here on the White House lawn. Ain't fuckin' natural. No more'n that lesbian tennis they're all watching over there in Winbletown. Those dykes come in here, gruntin' and sweatin' and carpet-munchin' all over my West Wing an' I'll fuckin' shoot them, too. Take 'em right out on the White House lawn, blow their fuckin' heads off. Got m'gun, right here in my pants, right next my catheter.<br/><br/> You know, best part of a hundred years we been fightng the Limey's wars for 'em, equipping their pansy army so's the faggot generals and admirals and all them other Ruperts can all mince about in gold fucking braid and fancy pants writin' poetry and gettin' spanked by their Goddamned batmen and what have they done in return? Invented communism and ass-fistin, that's what. Invented right there in London, both of 'em was. Seeni with mah own eyes. London England is now run by a womanising Greek sonofabitch surrounds himself with crooked clergymen and Goddamned perverts just like the last motherfucker, the one who ta;ks through his fucking nose, the one with the frogs and more wives'n'children than a fucking Mormon.<br/><br/> Time we sent the Seventh cavalry over there and rescue them decent Limey folks, while three still is a Limeyland, punish these fuckin' money-burnin' savages and put 'em all back on the reservation they come offa. Gonna lead the regiment mahself. Got m'gun, right here in my pants, next my catheter......She wore, she wore, she wore a yellow ribbon........<br/><br/> It's been real fine talking to you, mah fellow motherfuckers.<br/><br/> Rally round the flag, y'all, only not that blue communist one with the yellow faggot stars.<br/><br/><b><br/> July 4, 2008 1:48 PM </b></blockquote></div>Plumbers Assistanthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02799830542818857679noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1142220246378296886.post-4663116222984178802008-07-02T21:05:00.003-04:002008-07-02T21:16:46.180-04:00BBC.. Bolshevik Broadcasting Corporation.<dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c4290849088457078671">Anonymous said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Pi** off to America if you don't like Europe.<br /><br />Some people on this blog say they "want their country back" and think this will happen by selling the BBC to foreign investors, effectively replacing it with Foxnews.<br /><br />You think you can install a kind of "silicon" business culture in Britain, by removing from the British system anything that is not present in Silicon valley, and hey presto!<br /><br />Newsflash: Britain is NOT America. And it cannot be, ever, no matter how much you wish it were. America was created in direct opposition to Britain and all that she represents: nobility, monarchy, the class system, support for the underdog, political and religious cleavages, the make up of cities and their architecture, and the negative scepticism of the British people are all things that mean, even if you destroy the system that currently regulates our society, even if you impose a foreign, american system from above, it won't work in the same way in Britain as it does in America. The outcomes will STILL be different.<br /><br />Britain will end up with all the disadvantages of America and all the disadvantages of a rain sodden european island put together.<br /><br />You forget that there are many positive things about Britain that are not American, including the BBC. You have been brainwashed by the american neo liberal ideology into hating your own country and all that it stands for. All the positive things you ascribe to your country are actually american: free markets and democracy: the British empire was protectionist and undemocratic, and Britain still has an undemocratic monarchy. As Britons, you even hate free-market europe, forgetting that your country is european. You are intellectually confused and compromised by your foreign ideology.<br /><br />You act in the interests of a foreign power to destroy your own British culture: you hate any of your countrymen who seek to protect their culture through the BBC.<br /><br />You are a third column. you are traitors. Move to America. Under your criteria it is a better country.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/bankrupting-guardian.html?showComment=1215001560000#c4290849088457078671" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 2, 2008 1:26 PM</span></a><span class="item-control blog-admin pid-1151433915"><a href="http://www.blogger.com/delete-comment.g?blogID=8212152&postID=4290849088457078671" title="Delete Comment"> </a> </span> </span> </dd><dt class="comment-author blogger-comment-icon" id="c6347059683170250659"> <a name="c6347059683170250659"></a> <a href="http://www.blogger.com/profile/06088596240127998878" rel="nofollow"></a></dt><dt class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c207576693721152309"> <a name="c207576693721152309"></a> <br /></dt><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c207295634088474667"> <a name="c207295634088474667"></a> bob said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Surprisingly anonymous cunt @ July 2, 2008 1:26 PM.<br /><br />How funny, and we thought it was the cultural marxists of the BBC destroying the country.<br /><br />Well I never.<br /><br />As for the US and Britain, there's more between us than differentiates us, unlike the French and Germans for example.<br /><br />You might like the idea of the Chinese or Indians ruling the world, I'll stick with the Amrecicans thanks.<br /><br />The nation that has kept Europe from a major war for the last 60 years, unlike the EU which can't even stop a little Balkan genocide, fucking pathetic.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/bankrupting-guardian.html?showComment=1215002280000#c207295634088474667" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 2, 2008 1:38 PM</span></a></span></dd></dl><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c209873522667473453"> <a name="c209873522667473453"></a> <span style="font-weight: bold;">Anonymous said... </span></dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Bob:<br /><br />So you would choose subservience to America based on events that took place 60 years ago. What a lack of imagination. Your lack of ambtion betrays a typically British "can't do" attitude. Good luck in Silicon valley!<br /><br />Of course we share many things. But there are many things that seperate Britain from America too, and these are precisely the things you wish to destroy. Why is that?<br /><br />You think we are closer to america than to europe. But this is impossible. We ARE Europe. The european story could not be told without England. Americans certainly think so! The Queen of England epitomises european history and culture. There are also many things that we share with France and Germany. Why do you dislike these things so much? They are at the essence of our culture. Why is this difficult for you to accept?<br /><br />The answer to the above questions: You have been brainwashed by American neo-liberal thinking. The country you say you love is in fact America, you got the names mixed up. Your are a colonised subject of the american empire.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/bankrupting-guardian.html?showComment=1215003600000#c209873522667473453" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 2, 2008 2:00 PM</span></a></span></dd></dl><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt class="comment-author blogger-comment-icon" id="c1286450304366862837"> <a name="c1286450304366862837"></a> <a style="font-weight: bold;" href="http://www.blogger.com/profile/10628604286051915366" rel="nofollow">45govt</a><span style="font-weight: bold;"> said... </span></dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>unsurprisingly anonymous cunt (I would be too) @ 1.26.<br /><br />Are you for real you mong? - the BBC is one of the worst aspects of a failing nation - it was worth something once, but no longer. The strongest argument here today for it total erasure from the face of the earth, is the revelation that it (ie YOU) pays trolls to spend the licence fee combatting anti BBC discourse. Remind you of anywhere, you tosser?<br /><br />For all the sneering you - as you would, you know-nothing cunt - offer for the US, it is a far better champion of the underdog than Britain, as bob (now clearly sober, and angry!) points out above.<br /><br />And then you have the effrontery to blow this smoke, you gobshite:-<br /><br />"You act in the interests of a foreign power to destroy your own British culture: you hate any of your countrymen who seek to protect their culture through the BBC."<br /><br />Wotta nutter cunt you truly are - it is the Bliar Bollox Cunts like you together with the fascist ZaNuLab govt that are doing, and have done exactly that, by flooding the country with unassimilable aliens, and selling us off for their places at the EUSSR trough.<br /><br />Why don't you take your nasty statist, know-better-than-the serfs attitude and stuff it up your arse, you haemorrhoid - just fuck off back to somewhere they might have an interest in the shite you have to offer.<br /><br />BTW - not only the BBC pays to have trolls patrolling - the govt had three paid trolls on shift work on the Tel blogs up to the end of the local elections - now it's down to two part-timers, but they are fucked.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/bankrupting-guardian.html?showComment=1215004200000#c1286450304366862837" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 2, 2008 2:10 PM</span></a></span></dd><dt><br /></dt><dt class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c6356201974847182774"> <a name="c6356201974847182774"></a> radio 4 listener said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>I like the BBC, for all that it is a bit of a leftist propaganda machine; I simply ignore that bit.<br /><br />They have, however, commissioned shows like <i>The Thick of It</i> and lots of nice things about art and classical music, which I like because I'm middle-class. And radio 4. You wouldn't get any of that on a commercial station as anything even remotely 'edgy' would be avoided so as not to upset the advertisers, and anything that didn't appeal to the lowest common denominator wouldn't be popular enough. Many people have said it but <i>look</i> at ITV. That's what happens.<br /><br />In fact, the more I think about it, the BBC - and the Arts Council - is practically the only way in which the rest of the country subsidises things that I, and people like me, enjoy, which considering that we spend the rest of the time subsidising things that we don't give a shit about and don't use seems fair enough to me.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/bankrupting-guardian.html?showComment=1215004440000#c6356201974847182774" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 2, 2008 2:14 PM</span></a></span></dd></dl><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c2145081544011964368"> <a name="c2145081544011964368"></a> thick as thieves said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>what fun we are going to have with these pompous bbc cunts!<br /><br />anon 2pm,<br />and what party are you associated with?<br />or are you to ashamed to say?<br />I bet he runs away.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/bankrupting-guardian.html?showComment=1215004560000#c2145081544011964368" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 2, 2008 2:16 PM</span></a></span></dd><dt style="font-weight: bold;"><br /></dt><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author blogger-comment-icon" id="c6226367939487080413"> <a name="c6226367939487080413"></a> <a href="http://www.blogger.com/profile/10628604286051915366" rel="nofollow">45govt</a> said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>So you're back with this BS:-<br /><br />"So you would choose subservience to America based on events that took place 60 years ago. What a lack of imagination."<br /><br />Remember Kososvo - Europe's shining hour? What a lack of memory. The US, whether you choose to acknowledge it or not, but in your case I guess not, is still the last bastion of individual freedoms, just - unlike our European chums who are, surely with the wholehearted support of a useful idiot like you, have now decided to implement a rejected constitution anyway, as it turns out democracy is no longer a requrement. Cui bono?<br />They do the troughing bastards.<br /><br />WTF are you on?</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/bankrupting-guardian.html?showComment=1215004620000#c6226367939487080413" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 2, 2008 2:17 PM</span></a></span></dd></dl><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c4559008523663774671"> <a name="c4559008523663774671"></a> <span style="font-weight: bold;">Anonymous said... </span></dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Anonymous - July 2, 2008 1:26 PM<br /><br /><i>"Britain will end up with all the disadvantages of . . . . a rain sodden european island"<br /><br />...You act in the interests of a foreign power to destroy your own British culture: you hate any of your countrymen who seek to protect their culture through the BBC.</i><br /><br />You sneering BBC troll.<br /><br />The BBC does not protect our culture. It is deliberately trying to abolish English society and any English identity.<br /><br />We are not European. We are English. Like it or piss off back to Brussels.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/bankrupting-guardian.html?showComment=1215004680000#c4559008523663774671" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 2, 2008 2:18 PM</span></a></span></dd></dl><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c5714808043970797182"> <a name="c5714808043970797182"></a> <span style="font-weight: bold;">Bob said... </span></dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Anonymous cheeky fucker @ July 2, 2008 2:00 PM.<br /><br />You cheeky fucker, you deserve a ‘fisking’.<br /><br />Bob:<br /><br /><b>Mr Fucking Bob to you.</b><br /><br />So you would choose subservience to America based on events that took place 60 years ago. What a lack of imagination. Your lack of ambtion betrays a typically British "can't do" attitude. Good luck in Silicon valley!<br /><br /><b>1. I don’t choose anything I merely make the observation that the Russians, Chinese or Indians would be far worse if, heaven forbid they become the world super power.</b><br /><br /><b>2. What the fuck have I said about Silicon Valley. Though I will have you know that it was the Labour fucking Govt that destroyed British computing companies when it nationalised them all and made ICL, subsequently sold to Fujitsu, twat.</b><br /><br />Of course we share many things. But there are many things that seperate Britain from America too, and these are precisely the things you wish to destroy. Why is that?<br /><br /><b>Is this based on anything I said. I don’t think so. If you want to call me a cunt, just do it, don’t put words in my mouth. That’s a true pol for you, you cunt.</b><br /><br />You think we are closer to america than to europe. But this is impossible. We ARE Europe. The european story could not be told without England. Americans certainly think so! The Queen of England epitomises european history and culture. There are also many things that we share with France and Germany. Why do you dislike these things so much? They are at the essence of our culture. Why is this difficult for you to accept?<br /><br /><b>1. Politically we are closer to America than ‘Europe’ (To be clear, and we all know the difference between Europe and Continental Europe) this is indisputable</b><br /><br /><b>2. 'Why do I dislike these things so much’. You are rambling man, make a point that can be answered in less than a day. However, If you don’t understand the difference between the continental Napoleonic code and English Common law, it’s because you are a fucking idiot.</b><br /><br />The answer to the above questions: You have been brainwashed by American neo-liberal thinking. The country you say you love is in fact America, you got the names mixed up. Your are a colonised subject of the american empire.<br /><br /><b>In answer to your poorly composed and spelt drivel, see above.</b></p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/bankrupting-guardian.html?showComment=1215005100000#c5714808043970797182" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 2, 2008 2:25 PM</span></a><span class="item-control blog-admin pid-1151433915"></span></span></dd><dt><br /></dt><dt class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c7628890228175720815"> <a name="c7628890228175720815"></a> thick as thieves said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>'protect their culture'<br />you must be on acid you cunt.<br />funny how these wankers sound like communists, but are creaming it off like good ol' fashion capitalists.<br />if old women don't pay the bbc levy they get locked up. just so these cunts can live the high-life.<br />they are moral inverting motherfuckers.<br />let's get these fuckers up against the wall.<br />note to bbc trolls: don't make a fuss or I will be unable to get a clean shot.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/bankrupting-guardian.html?showComment=1215005460000#c7628890228175720815" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 2, 2008 2:31 PM</span></a></span></dd><dt style="font-weight: bold;"><br /></dt><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c100954776184206812"> <a name="c100954776184206812"></a> Anonymous said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>How amusing. All this bile and hatred directed against Britain, its television, it's institutions, its position in Europe, and thus ultimately yourselves: since it is this country, and this continent that made you who you are.<br /><br />You are like left wing americans who hate everything their country stands for and want it to be just like Sweden, when it never can be. Of course America wouldn't be America without their rantings. You are their european alter egos. You are what makes Europe Europe.<br /><br />As Europeans you represent the very worst of what europe is capable of producing: facism.<br /><br />The average American would have difficulty understanding what planet you are on.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/bankrupting-guardian.html?showComment=1215005520000#c100954776184206812" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 2, 2008 2:32 PM</span></a></span></dd><dt style="font-weight: bold;"><br /></dt><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c4870037120790842838"> <a name="c4870037120790842838"></a> Anonymous said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Guido,<br /><br />I hate these fucking BBC mongs.<br /><br />You can't say shit on their websites or blogs but they come over here, abusing your free speech with their stalinist bullshit.<br /><br />Off with their fucking heads.<br /><br />Come on you fuckers, we are allowed to show you up for the cunts you are.<br /><br />You got an argument, let's hear it.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/bankrupting-guardian.html?showComment=1215005640000#c4870037120790842838" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 2, 2008 2:34 PM</span></a></span></dd><dt><br /></dt><dt class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c2130613843916409172"> <a style="font-weight: bold;" name="c2130613843916409172"></a><span style="font-weight: bold;"> bob said... </span></dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Guido,<br /><br />Look at these communist 'disinformation' producing bastards:<br /><br /><b>"How amusing. All this bile and hatred directed against Britain, its television, it's institutions,"</b><br /><br />One institution motherfucker.<br /><br />Pravda, Al-Beeb, the fifth column.<br /><br />That's you that is.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/bankrupting-guardian.html?showComment=1215005820000#c2130613843916409172" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 2, 2008 2:37 PM</span></a></span></dd></dl><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c6154054445729995634"> <a name="c6154054445729995634"></a> <span style="font-weight: bold;">Anonymous said... </span></dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>What seperates your views from those Of Jorge Heider, Jean Marie Le Pen or the Valms Blok ?<br /><br />Very little, you're all european extremists.<br /><br />How dare you tarnish America's good name by attempting to associate your european prejudices with her ideals ?</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/bankrupting-guardian.html?showComment=1215005880000#c6154054445729995634" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 2, 2008 2:38 PM</span></a></span></dd><dt><br /></dt><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c3406827690887639389"> <a name="c3406827690887639389"></a> thick as thieves said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>anon 2.32,<br />no no, 'tis you who hates this country, not us.<br />you dissembling cunt.<br />now, chickenshit, answer my question, what political party are you affiliated to?<br />if you do not answer this time, you will have to be prescribed a fuck off tablet.<br />I BET HE BOTTLES IT AGAIN!<br />what a slimy cunt!<br />hold on, keith vaz, is that you?</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/bankrupting-guardian.html?showComment=1215005880001#c3406827690887639389" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 2, 2008 2:38 PM</span></a><span class="item-control blog-admin pid-1151433915"></span></span></dd></dl><dl id="comments-block"><dt class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c1417547341809524329"> <a name="c1417547341809524329"></a> <br /></dt><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c3831259761213480531"> <a name="c3831259761213480531"></a>bob said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Look at what this cunt writes:<br /><br />"As Europeans you represent the very worst of what europe is capable of producing: facism."<br /><br />Now I don't have a history degree but if my memory serves me right, England is the least likely country to vote for either nationalists or fascists.<br /><br />You must really hate your country. Although I honestly doubt an Englishman would write such slanderous shit.<br /><br />(I have just realised that by the spelling and ludicrous positions this mong has taken that he/she is in fact DES, I will now cease to rise, for the moment) .</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/bankrupting-guardian.html?showComment=1215006180000#c3831259761213480531" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 2, 2008 2:43 PM</span></a></span></dd></dl><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt class="comment-author blogger-comment-icon" id="c3226593054197648631"> <a name="c3226593054197648631"></a> <a style="font-weight: bold;" href="http://www.blogger.com/profile/10628604286051915366" rel="nofollow">45govt</a><span style="font-weight: bold;"> said... </span></dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Another (quelle surprise) anonycunt this one @ 2.32 and doubtless on the BBC's (our) time:-<br /><br />"this continent that made you who you are....As Europeans you represent the very worst of what europe is capable of producing: facism."<br /><br />The typical fascist accusation of yours is the big lie, repeated so often you have come to believe it yourself. We stand for freedom - individual freedom, which is anathema to the EUSSR ruling classes.<br />Made us what we are? You deluded cunt we led the world, and it is fifth-columnists like you who are determined that we become sheep.</p> </dd><dd style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/bankrupting-guardian.html?showComment=1215006360000#c3226593054197648631" title="comment permalink"> July 2, 2008 2:46 PM</a></span></dd></dl><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c5045081462667413045"> <a name="c5045081462667413045"></a> Anonymous said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>In any case your pernicious views are an irrelevence.<br /><br />Britain is America's slave. America set up the EU. And Britain's future is in Europe because that is where America wants her.<br /><br />Every new organisation creates itself in the hearts and minds of the people through opposition.<br /><br />The more you euro extremists like Goldsmith and Le Pen protest, the stronger the EU will get.<br /><br />You are nothing more than cogs in Monet's conveyor belt.<br /><br />As a pro European, I thankyou, little Eurofascists.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/bankrupting-guardian.html?showComment=1215006420000#c5045081462667413045" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 2, 2008 2:47 PM</span></a></span></dd><dt><br /></dt><dt class="comment-author blogger-comment-icon" id="c7805249288010032114"> <a name="c7805249288010032114"></a> </dt><dt class="comment-author blogger-comment-icon" id="c7805249288010032114"><a style="font-weight: bold;" href="http://www.blogger.com/profile/10628604286051915366" rel="nofollow">45govt</a><span style="font-weight: bold;"> said... </span></dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>No bob- DES would have given himself away by his iliteracy by now - this is a semi-educated gobshite cunt.</p> </dd><dd style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/bankrupting-guardian.html?showComment=1215006420001#c7805249288010032114" title="comment permalink"> July 2, 2008 2:47 PM</a></span></dd></dl><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c411500005815784307"> <a name="c411500005815784307"></a> thick as thieves said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>we fought hitler to defeat fascism and now we are fighting the fascist nature of the EU and fascist countries like Italy, and historically germany, spain and let's not forget the fascist rollover-cowards, france.<br />so you are quite right bob, anyone who calls the Btitish or English such names must be an agitator-retard.<br />and probably works at the bbc.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a style="font-weight: bold;" href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/bankrupting-guardian.html?showComment=1215006540000#c411500005815784307" title="comment permalink"> July 2, 2008 2:49 PM</a></span></dd></dl><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c6254710984491501696"> <a name="c6254710984491501696"></a> Anonymous said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>PS-<br /><br />I would call you CUNTS, but I feel that cunts deserve more respect than that.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/bankrupting-guardian.html?showComment=1215006660000#c6254710984491501696" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 2, 2008 2:51 PM</span></a></span></dd></dl><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c9118425307906605795"> <a name="c9118425307906605795"></a> Anonymous said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Have a wonderful afternoon.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/bankrupting-guardian.html?showComment=1215006720000#c9118425307906605795" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 2, 2008 2:52 PM</span></a><span class="item-control blog-admin pid-1151433915"></span></span></dd></dl><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c2768989341575877346"> <a name="c2768989341575877346"></a> <span style="font-weight: bold;">thick as thieves said... </span></dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>cunt 2.51,<br />no, you don't deserve any respect at all.<br />all you deserve is the rope.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/bankrupting-guardian.html?showComment=1215006780000#c2768989341575877346" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 2, 2008 2:53 PM</span></a></span></dd></dl><dl id="comments-block"><dt class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c2297003030986327769"> <a name="c2297003030986327769"></a><br /></dt><dt class="comment-author blogger-comment-icon" id="c3281149082916592437"> <a name="c3281149082916592437"></a> <a href="http://www.blogger.com/profile/04586735342675041312" rel="nofollow"></a></dt><dt class="comment-author blogger-comment-icon" id="c7531009363063806012"> <a name="c7531009363063806012"></a> <a style="font-weight: bold;" href="http://www.blogger.com/profile/15060519682739666145" rel="nofollow">Elby the Beserk</a><span style="font-weight: bold;"> said...</span> </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>@Fascism, national socialism, communism are all European inventions said...<br /><br /> sigh<br /> Surprisingly anonymous cunt @ July 2, 2008 1:26 PM.<br /> Lets have a close look at your beloved Europe, & the rich cultural / political institutions it has "given" the British:<br /> National Socialism<br /> Communism<br /> Fascism<br /><br /> ....& now the worst of all<br />three combined - the EU.<br /><br /> America has never attacked Great Britain & nor has it killed Britons anywhere near on the scale of your beloved Europe.<br />//<br /><br />Sonny boy, the good old US of A would have got to fascism, no problem, given a history as old as Yurp's. Indeed, many see President Cokehead Alkie Bush as a precursor to Fascism, in his contempt for your constitution.<br /><br />You'll get there, don't worry, and indeed, have made huge strides in the past 8 years.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/bankrupting-guardian.html?showComment=1215015300000#c7531009363063806012" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 2, 2008 5:15 PM</span></a></span></dd></dl><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c5396442390442399165"> <a name="c5396442390442399165"></a> <span style="font-weight: bold;">Anonymous said...</span> </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Anon 10:41...Look at the American Health Service - millions of people are outside it, it rolls far too many pills and extracts vast sums for directors' profits.<br /><br />A more effective public sector could do a great deal.<br />---------------------------<br />What socialist/proto-communist claptrap. The US life expectancy is better, cancer survival and heart disease survivaland the access to drugs for most is better, 6500 people didn't die last year from MRSA complicating surgery or the near 10,000 from C diff due to tractor prodcution targetry in the NHS.<br />Arent you ashamed that you kill people to maintain that throughput?<br />NHS a world leader...yes in killing people to keep politicians arses out of the fire! Glad you believe all that propaganda about the best in the world. As its the only one there's no competition. Even CHINA charges!<br /><br />LOL from Planet Mad!</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/bankrupting-guardian.html?showComment=1215022020000#c5396442390442399165" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 2, 2008 7:07 PM</span></a></span></dd><dt><br /></dt><dt class="comment-author blogger-comment-icon" id="c6337953094744792745"> <a name="c6337953094744792745"></a> <a href="http://www.blogger.com/profile/03642135656070350953" rel="nofollow"></a></dt></dl>Plumbers Assistanthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02799830542818857679noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1142220246378296886.post-53941746021861076012008-07-01T19:20:00.000-04:002008-07-01T20:21:10.772-04:00stanislav said... Gerry and Cilla McCann... and hedges.<dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c4675162161524666993">stanislav said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Gerry and Cilla McCann, both doctors, should be in Government, surely. Only trouble is they wouldn't answer any questions put to them on the grounds that they were worthless cunts, the pair of them.<br /><br />Got all the right attributes for politics - both doctors, vain, useless, cliche-spouting, selfish, fucking bastards who get some dumb fucks in the public to pay-off their mortgages. Seats in the Lords for Gerry and Cilla, both doctors. War on Portugal. Boycott Mateus Rose.<br /><br />Mustn't be cynical. It is Gerry and Cilla, after all, who are the real victims here, innit.<br /><br />Philomena Fishwife-McCann, people love her, don't they, she could be Gordon's PR machine. All she has to say is this is unhelpful at this time, anybody who knows Gordon knows he is a wonderful prime minister, he only slipped out for a quick blowjob, like any normal parent has done countless times and when he came back all the country's fucking money had fucking disappeared into thin fucking air, his friends saw somebody running off with it all under his arm, only they forgot to mention it until it looked like Gordon was going to jail and then Oh! Fuck me, there was loads of them, carrying all the country's money away, yes, I saw them, Me, too, didn't think it was inportant at the time.<br /><br />The money was both locked-up securely and not locked-up at all, whichever. And anyway the big denomination notes were all quite capable of looking after the small denomination notes should they wake up frightened, or choking.<br /><br />Gordon wants everyone in the world to go out and look in their sheds, and see if someone has put the money in thereerry and Cilla McCann, both doctors, should be in Government, surely. Only trouble is they wouldn't answer any questios put to them on the groubds that they were worthless cunts, the pair of them.<br /><br />Got all the right attributes for politics - both doctors, vain, useless, cliche-spouting, selfish, fucking bastards who get some dumb fucks in the public to pay-off their mortgages. Seats in the Lords for Gerry and Cilla, both doctors. War on Portugal. Boycott Mateus Rose.<br /><br />Mustn't be cynical. It is Gerry and Cilla, after all, who are the real victims here, innit.<br /><br />Philomena Fishwife-McCann, people love her, don't they, she could be Gordon's PR machine. All she has to say is this is unhelpful at this time, anybody who knows Gordon knows he is a wonderful prime minister, he only slipped out for a quick blowjob, like any normal parent has done countless times and when he came back all the country's fucking money had fucking disappeared into thin fucking air, his friends saw somebody running off with it all under his arm, only they forgot to mention it until it looked like Gordon was going to jail and then Oh! Fuck me, there was loads of them, carrying all the country's money away, yes, I saw them, Me, too, didn't think it was inpoertant at the time.<br /><br />The money was both locked-up securely and not locked-up at all, whichever. And anyway the big denomination notes were all quite capable of looking after the small denomination notes should they wake up frightened, or choking.<br /><br />Gordon wants everyone in the world to go out and look in their sheds and see if someone has put the money in there -it is vital that w efind this money - but he can't look himself because he has to go on tv right now and look important.<br /><br />It is quite a normal thing for busy professional people to leave the country's money lying around, alone, in the dark and unprotected we have all done it and so its three cheers all around for Gordon for losing us all our money, and not having to go to jail, like people who aren't dictors have to, Hip-hip Hooray....</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/another-day-another-downing-street-rat.html?showComment=1214936400000#c4675162161524666993" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 1, 2008 7:20 PM</span></a><span class="item-control blog-admin pid-1151433915"></span></span></dd></dl><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt class="comment-author blogger-comment-icon" id="c7625922039785746824"> <a name="c7625922039785746824"></a> <a style="font-weight: bold;" href="http://www.blogger.com/profile/11196343713837375340" rel="nofollow">Tuscan Tony</a><span style="font-weight: bold;"> said... </span></dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>I see stan is bladdered again.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/another-day-another-downing-street-rat.html?showComment=1214937600000#c7625922039785746824" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 1, 2008 7:40 PM</span></a><span class="item-control blog-admin pid-1041432712"><a href="http://www.blogger.com/delete-comment.g?blogID=8212152&postID=7625922039785746824" title="Delete Comment"> </a> </span> </span> </dd><dt class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c3989005851179601480"> <a name="c3989005851179601480"></a><br /></dt><dt class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c8165715644476584587"> <a name="c8165715644476584587"></a> </dt></dl><a name="c9110559392910188085"></a> <span style="font-weight: bold;">stanislav said... </span><dl id="comments-block"><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Dear Mr Tony Tuscan<br /><br />No Meditating on clipping a hundred metre hedge in this fucking Scottish rain between posting. No booze, chop my fucking leg off, else, Gremlins in the machine. Must need more olive oil pouring in.<br /><br />love from stanislav</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/another-day-another-downing-street-rat.html?showComment=1214940840000#c9110559392910188085" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 1, 2008 8:34 PM</span></a></span></dd></dl><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt class="comment-author blogger-comment-icon" id="c6687912151724302192"> <a name="c6687912151724302192"></a> <a style="font-weight: bold;" href="http://www.blogger.com/profile/11196343713837375340" rel="nofollow">Tuscan Tony</a><span style="font-weight: bold;"> said... </span></dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Soothing virgin elixir on its way, in spirit of not physically. Not for use in garden machinery unlike Mr. Sid Yobbo nihilist Hitch, - he get no more oil from TT no way <i>jose</i></p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/another-day-another-downing-street-rat.html?showComment=1214941080000#c6687912151724302192" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 1, 2008 8:38 PM</span></a></span></dd><dt><br /></dt><dd class="comment-footer"><span class="comment-timestamp"><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="item-control blog-admin pid-1041432712"><span style="text-decoration: underline;"></span></span></span><a name="c2160652006057892646"></a></dd><dd style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-footer"><br /></dd><dd style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-footer"> <a href="http://www.blogger.com/profile/15984396354633891857" rel="nofollow">Dennis</a> said... </dd><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Dear Mr Stanislav Unwin<br /><br />No need to clip yer hedge twice.<br /><br />Why clip it anyway? It only grows again. I suggest you set fire to it.<br /><br />In fact I am surprised that, what with Hedge Rage being all the rage, more hedges are not set fire to. Certain species (resinous ones especially, like <i>X Cupressocyparis leylandii</i>, otherwise known as the Terror of the Suburbs) go up very nicely indeed when ignited with used chip-wrappings. Crush said wrappings into a ball, thrust into hedge, strike match, leg it away to safe distance, watch (a) merry blaze and (b) householders emerging & jumping up and down. If you can get multiple sources of ignition, so much the better -- an excellent use for the <i>Daily Mirror</i>, <i>Independent</i>, & other journals of integrity and note.<br /><br />What species compose your hedge? In approximate order of flammability, I list some of the more popular hedge-components:<br /><br />1. Hawthorn (hopeless -- like trying to set wire alight; flammability 0/10)<br />2. Beech 2/10<br />3. Hornbeam 3/10<br />4. Box 5/10<br />5. Wilson's honeysuckle 7/10<br />6. Yew 8/10<br />7. Juniper 9/10<br />8. Gorse (as favoured in Scotchland) 9/10<br />9. Leyland's cypress 10/10<br /><br />I hope this information is thought-provoking and ultimately proves useful.<br /><br />Your botanical friend<br /><br /><i>Dennis</i></p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/another-day-another-downing-street-rat.html?showComment=1214943240000#c2160652006057892646" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 1, 2008 9:14 PM</span></a><span class="item-control blog-admin pid-628576845"></span></span></dd></dl><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c3702333267960458031"> <a name="c3702333267960458031"></a> <span style="font-weight: bold;">fire raiser said... </span></dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Dennis - you've missed a couple...<br /><br />3= Holly 3/10 (All smoke no fire)<br />7.5 Privet 9/10</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a style="font-weight: bold;" href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/another-day-another-downing-street-rat.html?showComment=1214954460000#c3702333267960458031" title="comment permalink"> July 2, 2008 12:21 AM</a><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="item-control blog-admin pid-1151433915"></span></span></dd></dl><br /><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c2102717945593268147"> <a name="c2102717945593268147"></a> stanislav said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>All around here Jock shakes ginger beetle-browed head and says No, cannae grow they hedgerow thingies up here, the noo, in all this wind, ye ken, so best jump back in bed wi' yon wee schoolboy.<br /><br />So stanislav grow half-mile, more, of thick luxuriant hedge, ten feet high and six feet thick and home to bird and bee and fuck knows what else, is like tropical fucking rain forest round here, get all burnt by winter's bitterbastard wind but come back right as fourpence every spring.<br /><br />Jock is just idle fucking bastard, why bother with nurture and cultivate and make garden and oxygen and wildlife when best thing is drink giro and headbutt Mrs in chops, and get sent in anger management course off probation oficer; why bother make fucking exercise when hospital is free off English blokes' tax. Jock would have garden if social services come and make one and maintain but otherwise is no fucking chance.<br /><br />Cannot, therefore, make hedge arson from hedge, matter of Anglo-Polish pride, - some corner of a foreign barbed wire-strung field that is forever England - but will consider possible flammability quotient of Jock, instead, bastard should go up like fucking rocket, innit, all that cheap booze and porridge and amyl nitrate.<br /><br />Will come and discuss species of hedge in your bell tower, cynical bastards here probably not recover from yesterday's child care lessons. Me neither.<br /><br />Jock response to noisy kid is, of course, throw down fucking stairs or go out and have quality time piss-up with professional Jock colleagues, leave kid alone and hope for fucking best, innit.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/another-day-another-downing-street-rat.html?showComment=1214956020000#c2102717945593268147" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 2, 2008 12:47 AM </span></a></span></dd></dl>Plumbers Assistanthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02799830542818857679noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1142220246378296886.post-84227985825793788052008-07-01T17:12:00.000-04:002008-07-01T20:23:52.976-04:00stanislav said... Does anybody here remember Vera Lynn ?<dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c8384653687497848208">stanislav said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Just like to say how nice it was to read all the child care stuff yesterday, quite like a proper antique newspaper.<br /><br />I was wondering if we might look forward to horoscopes, perhaps some gardening, maybe Mrs Dale from next door might write a knittibg column. It's in times like these, when our betters are struggling hard on our behalf that the family needs a proper, decent, Christian newspaper, packed full with interesting stories and useful tips for all the family. Jolly good work Mr Fawkes.<br /><br />Does anybody here remember Vera Lynn ?</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/gordon-emails-wendy-in-new-york.html?showComment=1214928720000#c8384653687497848208" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 1, 2008 5:12 PM </span></a></span></dd></dl>Plumbers Assistanthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02799830542818857679noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1142220246378296886.post-28176616952192302002008-07-01T13:53:00.000-04:002008-07-01T20:25:13.323-04:00stanislav said... Now, party suicide, that would be a Labour victory worth talking about.<dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c5755847819988051750">stanislav said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>The Jock Tribesmen's Party can win this one but if he would get his idle, ginger, beetle-browed, cross-dressers down to the polling station in enough numbers, Sheikh Ali bin Salmond must think laterally.<br /><br />Bearded Lady, Sir Sean Connery, is a busted jock flush, flying-in from Switzerland for a photo-op and some grunting now and again; shrieking old vamp, Annie Lennox, also from the Jock enclave in Switzerland, peddling her axpatriot nationalism may be effective among the odd closet heterosexual in the ranks but Jock wants real men, real men, that's what Jock craves.<br /><br />It may betoken a shared interest in boys-in-care or in strapping Tommy Arkins - many of him the Jock version- in a chair and torturing him to death but Ali has been cultivating Mr Marty Kneecaps McGuinness of late; Marty, a fellow Patriot Gamester who would've died, y'know, so he would, in Long Kesh, if only he could have, but instead must struggle on with a six-figure salary and pension from English taxpayers, whom he has already cost trillions of hospital-building pounds.<br /><br />Marty and Ali and some belligerent, sheep-shagging, Bread of Heaven imbecile troglodyte from Wales officially make common cause in order to cause difficulty for the Westminster Parliament - ie the rest of us, all fifty-five million of us.<br /><br />There's food for thought, eh? The terrorist torturer; the wee, fat, smirking, cross-dresser and the coal-stained sheepshagger, all lavishly paid and pensioned by the taxpayers of England while openly conspiring against them.<br /><br />Ali bin Salmond, anyway, if he toured Glasgow in an open-topped tartan 'bus with his chum, Marty Kneecaps, smiling his wee Semtex smile, the seat would be his. It would make little difference to the nice Polish and Chinese people who run Glasgow, but the indingenous Zombie neds, shuffling about in vomit-encrusted shellsuits, might be inspired to go down the polling booth, the noo, it doesn't matter that they cannae do that writing shite.<br /><br />Those clever Alexander people, together with Nutter Brown, have fucked Labour more severely in Scotland than in England, Brown's one appearance at the Dunfermline by election handing it to the Toilets party.<br /><br />So unnaturally, blood-curdlingly unpleasant, so viscerally repulsive, so nail-scrapingly on blackboard unnerving is this overstretched and overpromoted, cowardly and unpricipled unfortunate freak of nature that he wouldn't win an election in his own front room.<br /><br />Even the people of Fife will never re-elect him, not even at gunpoint: Awa' and get tae fuck wi' ye, ye mad, snot-eating lunatic, yer no' representing me, awa' noo or I'll call the polis. An' dinnae come back nae more. D'ye hear, g'an, awa' wi ye, ye fucking eejit.<br /><br />The Iraq occupation and all - via Jack Torture, Jackie Snotbuns, Blind Boy Blunkett, Lord Reid of Kabul and those sourgaced Ulster presbyterian cocksuckers - that has flowed from it, remain huge in Scotland's admirable, high-minded, dissident consciousness. Dawn raids, child internment, rendition flights, waterboarding, illegal munitions transport and Trident - all part of Brown's human rights agenda, rankle here ia way that they don't South. Labour is fucked in Scotland. Absolutely fucked.<br /><br />And while, for many in Scotland, voting for the Jock Tribesmen is an act as uncivilised and abominable as keeping dogshit in the 'fridge, times are hard and Labour is rightly sees as public enemy number one.<br /><br />The JockBeeb has its own rentagob psephologist, light entertainer and pretend professor, John Curtice, and these things are probably best left to people like him, withour proper jobs to go to. We might, however, consider. for ourselves that even those generationally affixed to the Labour Party are sickened to their stomachs by the Mandelson-Brown-Blair coup and the serried, suited ranks of thieving, degenerate ponces it has engendered on all sides of the house of commons.<br /><br />Maybe Glasgow's Labout voters will, in fact, accomplish the overdue, necessary act from which Gordon - sick, mad, bad, spiteful, bilious, paranoid, fucked-up, rotten and filthy, floundering and hopeless - shrinks.<br /><br /><br />Maybe, even amid the pigmy tumult of Salmond's ignorant and fascistic Jock horde, it will be Brown's own countrymen, of his own party, who will persuade him, by their lack of support, that it really is time to Come out Gordon. Come out and fuck off. Now, party suicide, that would be a Labour victory worth talking about.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/pundits-think-snp-could-take-glasgow.html?showComment=1214916780000#c5755847819988051750" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">July 1, 2008 1:53 PM </span></a></span></dd></dl>Plumbers Assistanthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02799830542818857679noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1142220246378296886.post-72220424214894821832008-06-30T16:31:00.002-04:002008-06-30T19:19:58.581-04:00stanislav said... ...sanctimonious prats, the brothers Dimb<dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c1986284144071438607">Anonymous said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>There must be some dirt on those sanctimonious prats the Dimblebey brothers. J was amanuensis for Chaz Windsor. D former member of Bullers and he is a patronising sod and very anti Tory. They are both serious shaggers.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/sunday-sleaze-round-up_29.html?showComment=1214835000000#c1986284144071438607" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">June 30, 2008 3:10 PM </span></a></span></dd><dd style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-footer"><br /></dd><dd style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-footer"><span style="font-size:130%;"><br /></span></dd><dd style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-footer"><span style="font-size:130%;">Stanislav said... </span></dd><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Dear Mr Anonymous<br /><br />...sanctimonious prats, the brothers Dimb<br /><br />Oh please, God, send us some of that Dimbleby shit. I'll become a Mick, go to confession and everything; right in there with the noncing monsignors. A Hebie, even, change my name to MoshePlumbcheap4U and live on fucking anchovies and that fucking miserable bastard faminebread that's like sweepings-up from the floor of the Digestive biscuit factory, mixed with piss and dried in the airing cupboard. Grow a beard and live in Golders Green.<br /><br />There's already something, innit, about those two and their respective Mrs Dimblebys.. Something aside from their wholly improper, hereditary lifelong domination of current affairs at the Beeb, that is.<br /><br />Was Johnno there when Charlie went round to see Major Parker-Bowles ? Come to roger your old woman, don't mind do you. Not at all, Sir, not at all. Not on the rags is she, wouldn't want to be slipping her one in the servants entrance, eh, although come to think about, might make a change. Slip off now Parker-Wotsit and amuse yourself while I dip the royal wick in your wife, the mother of your children. Diana ? No idea, probably chomping on some wog doctor's cock, there must be a few she hasn't blown. Mad cunt. Threw herself down the stairs the other night, just like that. Anyway, all officers and gentlemen here, Mum's the word and there's a colonelcy in it for you. A brigade, maybe. Him ? One of those Dimbleby oiks. Dunno, old bean, just hangs around, grovelling; he can come and help me on and off with the old rubber johnny, eh, make himself useful. Won't be long old chap. Come and give her one yourself when I'm done, if you like. She's your Mrs.. Tally Ho! Dieu et mon droit, what?</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/sunday-sleaze-round-up_29.html?showComment=1214839860000#c594631372012773157" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">June 30, 2008 4:31 PM </span></a></span></dd></dl>Plumbers Assistanthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02799830542818857679noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1142220246378296886.post-32335454123127688142008-06-30T13:30:00.000-04:002008-06-30T19:15:57.857-04:00stanislav said... From the Jocksman, one of the many British newspapers driven into the ground by MrJock Neil of the BBC.<dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c4196394908798011081">stanislav said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>From the Jocksman, one of the many British newspapers driven into the ground by MrJock Neil of the BBC.<br /><br />Scotland's McBaath party was celebrating in the streets yesterday after the beheading of it's sworn enemy, Wendy al Halibut, leader of the bin Alexander tribe; haggises were discharged into the air as grown men, sort of, wept for joy, their hands up each others' kilts, tongues down each others throats, in traditional McBaath fashion.<br /><br />Vengeful, melancholy, embittered morons stormed the message boards of the Jock press, sat at home in their high-rise blocks, in the biggest council estate in England, eating lard pies, swigging Scotsmac and Irn Bru, the mad wee fantasists, probably wearing their skirts and their wee plaid socks, bless, leapt on any who declined the poisoned Nationalist chalice.<br /><br />Ranting of the coming one-party McBaath state, these poor semi-literate, peasant tribesmen, the al-See-You-Jimmys, cutting and pasting the Infidels' comments and adding That's shite that is, you labour twat, - much too dumb to paraphrase or summarise, much less originate - gave a fair impersonation of 1930s Berlin or 1990s Baghdad, heedless that this is what poor Jock - like Fritz and Abdul - always does, follows some Messiahanic, jumped-up, cheesy sound-biting would-be Princeling into poverty and ignominy and while he often escapes to Europe, Jock doesn't.<br /><br />Poor Jock cannae see that Kings, Princes and political careerists are just that. It is their own grandeur and conceit which concerns them, their own legacy, which, even should they raze and ruin all about, transcends.<br /><br /><br /><br />Sitting, though, with his press secretary, Mr Ian Kneepads McWhirter of that ilk, surrounded by a crack regiment of the feared McBaath Revolutionary Guard (Grand Vizier Lady Sir Sean Connery and his Magic Sword, the hermaphrodite ginger singing duo, the al-Proclaimers and Lulu bin Botox ) and toasting events with a chilled glass of his own piss, the McBaath leader, Caliph Sheikh Ali bin Salmond, promised that he would sequester the salary and pension of the late Ms bin Halibut and add it to the three or four he currently received as leader of the Jock Caliphate, from the Infidel Englander taxpayers. As well as the five million dollars from his Local Democracy Secretary, Mr McDonald McTrump. He would do this, give this money to himself, he said, to cheers, for Scotland.<br /><br />(The daft wee ginger bastards don't see that the bin-Salmond Jock Emirates will be merely a tiny dependent region of the unelected New European Order of Mandelson and Kinnock, Alec a fat, pompous satrap.)<br /><br />He was now, he thought, smugly, the undisputed leader of the entire Jock Diaspora, which ran through job centres, battered wives refuges, prisons, detoxification units, STD cinics and mortuaries all across the known world. Crack open a barrel of my ain pish, the 2007 vintage, and drink ye your fill, lads, make yourselves worthy of me.<br /><br />Ye shall be my weapons of mass inebriation, my warriors of idleness. Awa' ye tae Coventry, Birmingham and London, knife folk in the back, head-butt the Infidel when he expects ye not. But dinnae say I told you or we're all fucked.<br /><br />Sheikh Ali, a pretend economist and a short, balding, oily little chap in built-up shoes had even more reason than usual to be pleased with himself. His octogenarian pretend wife was in a tent at the far side of the camp, tending the camels, McWhirter of The Herald was pleasuring him and he had adoring ginger men in skirts and shiny shoes all around, joyfully complicit in their own great Caravan to Doom.<br /><br />Alec Ahbar !Alec Ahbar! Alec is Great, went up the cry around the camp as Jock Suicide Drinkers assembled, anxious to enter MacParadise and claim their free seventy-two beating-wives.<br /><br />Far away, in London, Ali bin Salmond's other sworn enemy, el Sultan al presbyterian Gordon bin Brown was in a most mighty, tumultuous strop, biting other people's fingernails, hurling telephones at his secretaries, dashing every few minutes into the toilet for a fierce bout of dry masturbation, cursing Donald bin Skinflint Dewar and Tony el Miranda Blair with equal venom.<br /><br />They fucking bastards up there, they'll fucking do for us, they will, give 'em their own fucking bastards parliament and look how the fucking bastards fucking well behave.<br /><br />Regime change. That's the fucking answer. Send for the fucking army. Whaddayamean the army's no' fucking here, its stuck up some fucking wog mountainside in the arse-fucking-hole of fucking bastard fucking nowhere, where nobody, nobody, not even the whole bastard Red Fucking Army has ever beaten these beardy fucking wog arse bandits. What's it fucking doing there ? What ? John fucking Reid sent it there ? For a nice, wee rest ? The fucking useless, smelly little Weegie gangster, i knew he'd be in on it.<br /><br />At the Zimbabwe Independent, Yasmin Alibhai Moslem and Jojo Lardboy Hari were quite lost for words. Yabbo hoped that, as Ali bin Salmond's co-religionist, she would be able to make-up some Speaking-as-a-moslem-woman rubbish in advance of the next Question Time; JoJo took some more drugs, inhaling, he hoped, inspiration and not cancer.<br /><br />Mr stanislav, the former artisan and now prime ministerial spokesplumber reflected ruefully that, having mentioned brother Mugabe's similarities to Mr Brown, the prime minister, at some length yesterday, he seemed to be getting somewhat out of sync with what passes in Britain, for fucking reality and had better have a quick kip in the back of the van before he warped into another dimension, entirely.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/rich-marks-monday-morning-view_30.html?showComment=1214829000000#c4196394908798011081" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">June 30, 2008 1:30 PM </span></a></span></dd></dl>Plumbers Assistanthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02799830542818857679noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1142220246378296886.post-36103525138499980102008-06-29T19:15:00.003-04:002008-06-29T19:19:17.896-04:00stanislav said...The art of politics is looking after numero uno with any good for the voters a fortunate and often accidental side effect.<dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author blogger-comment-icon" id="c7731704686240685921"><a href="http://www.blogger.com/profile/13586011083079057020" rel="nofollow">Seaxe</a> said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Hmmmm, The good lady Poppinjay, she of the liberality with "favours", smarmy, smug, patronising child of Sunny Jim, worked her way up from the top, fancy school in south London path through every day life smoothed and cleared by Daddy and well connected friends. More socialising than socialist but a force to be reckoned with in the world of nepotism. Merit? Pah! Still, what did we expect? Daddy was a socialist from the working classes, so she would marry a bricklayer and live happily ever after on a nice little housing state in Milton Keynes. Where she brings up three kids who go to a local comp. They scrimp and save and by the time they have been married forty years they retire to a little bungalow near St. Leonards. "Nice 'ere innit?"<br /><br />The art of politics is looking after numero uno with any good for the voters a fortunate and often accidental side effect.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/exclusive-indy-owner-profits-from.html?showComment=1214755140000#c7731704686240685921" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">June 29, 2008 4:59 PM </span></a></span></dd></dl><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c5339293938260325678">stanislav said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p><span style="font-weight: bold;">Dear Mr Seaxe</span><br /><br />Amen, brother, hang 'em high, hallelujah, hang 'em high.<br /><br />You just forgot that the obnoxious fuckpig Callaghan extended his patronage to son-in law and pretend economist, Peter Smarm, then married to his giant daughter, by appointing him UK Ambassador to the US. Margaret showed her pedigree by banging,as mentioned above, the Washington press corps.<br /><br />Pete Smarm, having ditched the old slapper, Callaghan-Jay, became, briefly, the most embarrassing Economics editor ever sinecured by the BBC, worse than Fatarse Flanders and twinky Evan Davies combined. The Jay-Callaghans, an entirely rubbish couple, propelled by crooked Labour connections to heights infinitely above their joint or individual merits.<br /><br />This horrid old outsize boot, sent by Socialist Farmer Jim to an exclusive, fee-paying, ladies' leg-spreading college, has championed state education while, like radical socialist MP, Diane Lard, educating her own spawn privately and expensively.<br /><br />Jay's only experience of work is, like Gordon Brown's and her former husband's, in sucking cocks up and down the corridors of the BBC, Repulsive old slags, all of them. Baroness my arse, horrible old slapper. Up against the wall, motherfuckers.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/exclusive-indy-owner-profits-from.html?showComment=1214760360000#c5339293938260325678" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">June 29, 2008 6:26 PM</span></a></span></dd></dl><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c7553581643579280619">Cassandra said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p><span style="font-weight: bold;">Stanislav,</span><br /><br />A few addenda:<br /><br />La Jay attended Blackheath High School GPDST which, at the time, was a direct grant school so it is possible that she had a "free place" i.e. was funded by the state as a substantial proportion of the girls would have been at that time. The Direct Grant system enabled many kids from less affluent backgrounds to attend selective academic schools. I forget who abolished it...<br /><br />La Jay has a full CV. She was appointed as the first Director of the National AIDS Trust in spite of being the daughter of a former PM and the cousin by (ex)marriage of Virginia Bottomley. She was later given a peerage having, through her Ugandan discussions with one of the Government's main AIDS experts, provided a sterling example to yoof.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/exclusive-indy-owner-profits-from.html?showComment=1214770140000#c7553581643579280619" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">June 29, 2008 9:09 PM </span></a></span></dd></dl><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c4356120895821732326">stanislav said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p><span style="font-weight: bold;">Dear Mr Cassandra</span><br /><br />stanislav go in direct fucking grant grammar school and not notice any peerage and life of ermine in subsidised bar and restaurant and brothel flowing his fucking way, innit, no job on quango with fifteen grand for half day a fucking month rubberstamping bent doctors. Maybe is because of plumbing heritage and not socialist egaliotarian aristo like Hilary Millionaire Benn, the unspeakable cunt and this poxed-up old bicycle, Jay and no, Mr Beast, you need eye test, can get fix-up off laser eye plumbing service for few hundred of pounds, stanislav can do if hand is steady. Unlike Mr Bob and Mr Guido and Mr Tuscan from Cyber Alcoholics AnonymousRus<br /><br />Next time you feel like catching clap off Callaghan junior, instead just phone stanislavplumbcheap4u, get good earbashing, go away a sadder and a wiser beastman. Y'know, like wedding guest in Rime off Ancient Plumber, innit.<br /><br />It is an Ancient plumber and he stoppeth one of three. The guests are met, the table set, now, wherefore stopp'st thou me ? Is mine khazi fuck-ed-up, with turd and condom and sanitary towel and bogroll flowing down mine esteem-ed staircase....etc.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/exclusive-indy-owner-profits-from.html?showComment=1214777640000#c4356120895821732326" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">June 29, 2008 11:14 PM </span></a></span></dd></dl><br /><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c7141623736702338681"> <a name="c7141623736702338681"></a><br /></dt></dl>Plumbers Assistanthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02799830542818857679noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1142220246378296886.post-40800738416080178902008-06-29T14:40:00.000-04:002008-06-29T19:26:03.664-04:00stanislav, a young polish plumber said... Here in HMP UK we have other fish to fry.<dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c9053362905511853960">stanislav, a young polish plumber said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p><span style="font-weight: bold;">Dear Mr Englishman Abroad at 11.31</span><br /><br />Yes, they have us stumbling abiout in a wilderness of mirrors. Yes, what is it with all this Zimbabwe shit ? Who gives a fuck? No, really, who gives such a fuck that it's all over the antique media? Emily Stick Insect and Jon Sopel wetting themselves under the newsreaders' desk; useless, thieving, Kofi Anan lisping himself into a frenzy of helplessness; ArchfuckingBishopfucking Tutu, Peace, Man-ing all over the place, and Reconciliation, wretched meddling grandstanding fucking hobgoblin And Billy the Kid doing his This is ay very serious matter Mr Deputy Spanker ay, might I say, very serious matter ah ah ah Mr Deputy Spunker, so serious that ay paid clown, Mr Deputy Splasher, of the after-dinner variety, such as the right honourable member, myself, should fuck off, not to put ah-ah too fine ay point on it, out of it; that will be fifteen hundred guineas, please....Did I ever tell members and right honourable members of my experience of drinking ay very considerable number, ay-ay-ay very considerable number of pints of coarse alcohol with some rough, muscular, perspiring working-class laddies, well, let me assure members of this place and the other place that I very quickly learned the ah ah ah veracity, Mr Deputy Spunker, of that old popular song, There Ain't Nothing Like Ay Gangbang, indeed there ain't Mr Deputy Spanker, indeed there ain't. There surely ain't, Nothing like ay gangbang. And ay session of sweaty, one-nation Tory man-love in the gym with Lord Sebastian is far more agreeable than being, if I may say so, the gangbangee.<br /><br />And Nick Suit and Haircut, God fucking help us, the Chief Toileteer, pretending to be a world statesman, worthless, worthless, worthless cunt; Yes, I know it will be difficult for Zimbabweanesians to eat, without money being sent them from the UK but I have thought long and hard about it and, in my opinion, starve they must. There are more important things than living, although not for me, of course, rich people are more valued, after all, born, like myself, to lead. Into the toilets. Am I happy that some brown people may starve? No, of course I'm not, but better them than me and anyway, how else am I to distinguish my own leadership style from that of Field Marshal Ashdown's or my immediate predeceased leader, Mr Ming Whatsit QC, the old Scotch corpse. Am I saying that if I ruled the world everyday would be the first day of Spring? why, yes, I suppose I am. And if you are asking me, or as is more often the case in my interviews, am I asking myself, would every head be held up high, sunshine in everyone's eye then the answer is yes, only not counting the starving Zimbabweanesianites.<br /><br />Who is this cunt, Clegg ? Who, in Zimbabwe or anywhere the fuck else cares what he thinks? Fucking idiot. Libdems, he said, far from going nowhere in the polls, are taking over the manning of toilets all over the North. Never mind that, what about a referendum on Europe?<br /><br />Our Chinese friends whip the kidneys out of petty thieves before the bullet has gone through the back of their necks and come out the other side; China is a one-party gerontocratic dictatorship, too, with a dismal approach to human rights and a politics built on mountains of murdered citizens, yet Sir Ian Blair-Bendover allows armed Chinese thugs to roam the streets of London manhandling British citizens; David Millipede, the pretend foreign secretary doesn't say a word about that, horrible, malformed, hereditary fascist, yet he "expects" this, that and the other of Zimbabwe, like he was Lord fucking Nelson. As though anybody in the world gives a fuck what he says, most insignificant foreign secretary in history, good for fuck all, what must people think when they see this creep and the prime minister mincing around, the world, pretending to speak for Britain, looking for babies to purchase, spunkless, anaemic little turd; be better off with a Teletubbie in the FO.<br /><br />Saudi Arabia and all those other eyeball-scoffing, barbarian shitholes chop people's heads and limbs off and stone women to death and yet Big Nancy Brown is over there making an even bigger cunt of himself than he already is; difficult though that is to accomplish, he is doing his very best. No censuring of Sheikh Ali Baba from our principled prime minister.<br /><br />India throws young women alive into the funeral pyres of their dead old husbands, fucking savages, and considers many of its citizens to be sub-human, no talk from Millipede or Nick Halibut of economic sanctions against the Indian democracy.<br /><br />And as for a few hundred deaths and some thousands made refugee in Zimbabwe, the UK parliament's support of Dubya's banditry in Eye-rack has killed maybe a million, maimed more and made millions refugee; Uncle Bob Mugabe's crimes are small beer compared with those of our own ZanuLab government and many others with whom we enjoy cordial relations. Why isn't the BBC showing tne ongoing reality of Iraq, four Global oil cartels now forcing, via the US puppet government, thrity year contracts ceding Ieaq's oil to GlobaCorp, without so much as a kiss-my-arse to the people who own it. Don't hear Emily taxing her limited intelligence with that one.<br /><br /><br />If Mugabe is all that bad and relatively speaking he is not, then its a matter for that idle cunt Tabu M'beki and all those other tinpot, head-shrinking, cannibal tribalists jointly running Africa into the ground, starving its peoples and shoving my money into Swiss bank accounts, let them cut his liver out and eat it before his eyes, like they do, bless, or let them dismember his grandchildren, hack them limb from limb with their charming, traditional machetes and that great sense of rhythm. It's their continent, Let them get on with it. Leave Gordon the JockBeast to his wanking, something he's good at<br /><br />Here in HMP UK we have other fish to fry; a fascistic hegemony, characterised by the repulsive Mandelson, the swinish Kinnocks and the grinning Blairs, rimming each other around European capitals at my expense, dismantles, before our very eyes, everything good, quirky, different about this funny, imperfect little set of islands and they have the effrontery to tell us that even though they are not elected they know, better than we, the people, what is good for us. This, the destruction of the UK is rather more important than some shithole in Africa which, whoever is in power, will quickly revert to tribal type. That's what happens, that's what they do in Africa. Bob Geldof and his vile pampered degenerate spawn can go all go and fuck themselves with a knobkerrie. And Mr Bono, him too. Cunt.<br /><br />Talk about bent elections in Africa, we have in the UK a prime minister doubly illegitimate; firstly, he is elected to Westminster by an electorate to which he is not accountable and he should take no part in implementing legislation for England and secondly, at the last general election, Cardinal Blair pledged that he would serve, if that's the word, a full term as prime minister. A bogus MP, Brown and bogus PM.<br /><br />The very, very least the Labour Party should have done, if it had a shred of honour, the very least Brown should have insisted upon was the calling of an immediate general election to validate his position. Instead this wretched,cowardly, bullying, mis-shapen, ill-tempered and unqualified freak attempts to bamboozle the democratic process with Jock blether about values, the rotten, two-faced, presbyterian hypocrite; instead, this stuttering, gibbering, squirming, shameless snot-eating prick dismantles our rights, our freedoms and pollutes the very temper of our discourse, sewing fear and suspicion among a people who - without the co-operation, mind, of Jean-Jacques and Mario and Sven, all then busy bending over for Fritz - withstood not just a July bombing but a daily blitz of hundreds of tons of hot metal falling on their heads, lasting for years.<br /><br />Gordon M'Brown, Jacqui M'Smith and Jack M'Torture are a far greater menace to this country and, demonstrably, the world, than is Robert Mugabe. All would imprison their citizens without charge, all, especially M'Torture, would accept as evidence material obtained by barbarism, cruelty and terror; all mock the electoral process, all act as judge and jury in their own cases, all empower politicised police chiefs to gun down law-abiding citizens; all would urge detention without charge, trial with anonymous witnesses, the curtailing and eventual abandonment of jury trials; all support kidnap, torture, rendition, massive embezzlement, fraud and corruption extending even to appointments to the legislature; taxpayers' money funneled to dodgy financiers, books cooked, statitics cooked, graft, incompetence, malfeasance and international banditry; the citizen locked-out of a crooked state propaganda broadcaster; aren't these aspects of modern Britain exactly what so many mean here by the epithet ZanuLabour ?<br /><br />When we have a referendum or an election, when the thieving bastards in Brussels and Westminster, especially le famille Kinnock, are sacked and jailed, instead of mildly admonished by their own, then it might be time for wall-to-wall bitching about Zimbabwe, but preferably China. In the meantime, Zimbabwe is a useful diversion for those who so mis-serve us and for their pimps in the antique media.<br /><br />George Steiner wrote that the holocaust happened because the Berlin intelligentsia was too engrossed listening to the string quartet in the salon to hear the cry in the street. We are heading rapidly into a Euro police state and we dally with Zimbabwe at our peril. The phony, aching conscience of Radio Four, the faux reportage of Newsnight, the stagey confrontations of Jock Neil and the bogus liberalism of Rusbridger's Guardian, this ensemble is our string quartet, this is the fifth column, we have our own regiment of Mugabes, gleefully force-feeding each other with public money, pensions, honours and mansions; these and not Zimbabwe should be the focus, these, the fascists of MediaMinster, are the real enemy, the enemy within.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/sunday-sleaze-round-up_29.html?showComment=1214746800000#c9053362905511853960" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">June 29, 2008 2:40 PM</span></a><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="item-control blog-admin pid-1151433915"></span></span></dd></dl><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c3533462660400147654"> <a name="c3533462660400147654"></a> stanislav said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>ps. thanks Guido and others for the sleaze digest. How low are we sunk that such a thing can be so routinely assembled, without there being a national outcry ?</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/sunday-sleaze-round-up_29.html?showComment=1214747040000#c3533462660400147654" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">June 29, 2008 2:44 P</span></a></span></dd></dl><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author blogger-comment-icon" id="c6076081529631411429"><a href="profile/15984396354633891857" rel="nofollow">Dennis</a> said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Marshall's daughter -- looks distinctly porcine to me, esp. the uptilt on the nostrils.<br /><br />Her pater was a Glaswegian bus conductor, just the kind of high-octane talent that has thrust UK plc into the forefront of the world economy. He considered each and every parliamentary vote on its merits and by the exacting demands of his conscience. Not for him the swinish conformity into which lesser MPs are bullied by the whips.<br /><br />He will be a great loss to the country. His grateful constituents will rightly spurn the opportunist advances of the SNP.<br /><br />Or not, as the case may be.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/sunday-sleaze-round-up_29.html?showComment=1214746380000#c6076081529631411429" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">June 29, 2008 2:33 PM </span></a></span></dd></dl><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c2678329193293989410">stanislav said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p><span style="font-weight: bold;">Dear Mr Dennis</span><br /><br />I thought we were agreed. Your bit is punctuation, re-hashing Juke Box Jury with Mr Beast; securing the bonnet catches on Triumph Herald variants; issues around having sexual relations with dwarves and mobility challeneges faced by disabled bell-ringers, y'know, old-aged cripple shit. You leave Jock to me; there'll be trouble, else.<br /><br />love from stanislav</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/sunday-sleaze-round-up_29.html?showComment=1214757960000#c2678329193293989410" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">June 29, 2008 5:46 PM </span></a></span></dd></dl><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author blogger-comment-icon" id="c5063361757052431100"><a href="profile/15984396354633891857" rel="nofollow">Dennis</a> said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Stan, fair enough. To you I bequeath any and all surrealist bile encompassing the usual Hibernian suspects, as: Kirsty McWarrrk, Wendy and Doogie, Speaker McMartin of That Trough, Robert McGabe, Archbishop McTutu, Thabo McBeki -- who I found today is an "alumnus" of my own university & with another tinted student gentleman haunted many of the low caffs and pubs frequented by my vanished self, including a restaurant called The Black Cat, on the streetdoor of which, one midday when I required victuals, I was not really astonished to find a sign reading "Closed for Lunch". Said McBeki preceded me there by quite a few years and was enrolled in another School, but still the association is disagreeable and clouds otherwise happily memories, enfumed in cannabis, of obliging middle-class girls freed for the first time from the shackles of home.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/sunday-sleaze-round-up_29.html?showComment=1214774520000#c5063361757052431100" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">June 29, 2008 10:22 PM </span></a></span></dd></dl>Plumbers Assistanthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02799830542818857679noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1142220246378296886.post-19638360731949842842008-06-28T15:30:00.001-04:002008-06-29T19:38:48.907-04:00stanislav said...A statement prepared by Mr Brown<dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c7379863845485359443">stanislav said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>A statement prepared by Mr Brown on the event of his friend, lieutenant, and sister of his ADC, Mr Douglas McFerret, Miss Wendy McHalibut, being drummed oot the Gay Gordons. The statement was delivered by Mr Brown's plumber and honorary Jock, Mr stanislav, on the steps of Downing St., all government spokespersons being unavailable.<br /><br /><br /><br />"I would just like to thank Ms Nessy for her sterling service to the Labour Party up in Scotland, one of the very best parts of England; for her shrewd and considered leadership and mature judgement. I would like to put on record the appreciation of all who believe in equality, social justice and opportunity, tempered, of course, with Obedience, for her exemplary conduct and most of all for the way in which she has harried that bitch, Salmond.<br /><br />As I said, I would like to make these tributes but this loudmouthed, fish-faced, Jock slapper fuck-up has buggered us completely. We are totally fucked; we were fucked before but now we are so fucked we can't hardly walk, we are fucked in a way that Raymundo Mandelson of Los Tory Rentboys never endured, even when he was being squired by the entire Opposition front bench, William.<br /><br />Not enough that that bastard Hain is up to his arse in it, not enough that Ed and his bitch are a laughing stock, that the party hasn't a pot to piss in, couldn't fight an election for parish councillor, not enough that CokeFace is running London, that the BNP beat us in Henley and those gravedigging bastards are all set to kick off again and half the country's soon to be in negative equity, shivering and carless, and that's just the tip of the fucking iceberg, comrades; as if this wasn't bad enough that fucking stupid ugly cow puts the cap on it by getting barred rfom that fucking pretend parliament, in Glasgow, or whatever jock shithole it's in. Thanks to this ugly minger we will all be a laughing stock, alright then, a bigger laughing stock.<br /><br />Wendy Alexander has now completely rubbished, degraded and fucked the national Labour Party and if Sid and Doris, the party members, had any sense they'd throw me out and save what they can but axiomatically, the fact that I'm here at all, stuttering, is proof that they have no sense.<br /><br />All is not lost though and the people of Britain may yet see me guide them through the global economic turbulence which has not been created either by myself or my friends in the banks but by terrorists at the Meteorolgical office; we may yet all benefit from the right long-term decisions for hard-working gullible, nomeless British families which I and only I can make, decisions like appointing the Alexanders to positions of influence and power.<br /><br /><br />Douglas Alexander, let us not forget, with His Grace the Earl Kinnock, was way ahead of Brother Mugabe, bringing a touch of ZimbabweDemocracy to the last, rigged, Jock election, even though it didn't quite produce the desired result, but he's only young, and I do love him so.<br /><br />And Wendy, well, my tribute, and the debt we all owe her cannot be put into words.<br /><br />We, or I, must not be sidetracked by shame, humiliation, incompetence, dishonesty and wretchdness. Let us not forget that when Brother Bush was at his lowest, in his first term, when people questioned his legitimacy and the result of the election, in his very darkest hour, the Lord sent the terrible events of nine-eleven to assist him. And who would doubt that his subsequent handling of events has made the world a much better place while greatly increasing the bank balances of some prominent Labour politicians and their witchwives.<br /><br />And so it may prove with me, events, dear boy may deliver us from the abyss, from this black hour, into one deeper and darker yet.<br /><br />As the great Labour poet, Dr Bob McDylan remarked When you got nothing, you got nothing to lose.<br /><br />We will now sing the New British Psalm for Hard-working British families: Gordon is my shepherd, I shall not want, He maketh me down to lie, and shit in my face and tax me to death, the quiet waters by.<br /><br />Thank you ladies and gentlemen. There will be no further comment until the terrorist attack happens."</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/guynews-unhappy-anniversary-gordon.html?showComment=1214663400000#c7379863845485359443" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">June 28, 2008 3:30 PM </span></a></span></dd></dl>Plumbers Assistanthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02799830542818857679noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1142220246378296886.post-50134923964420673352008-06-28T12:43:00.000-04:002008-06-29T19:44:47.253-04:00stanislav said... we never win the election, it is always they who win.<dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c4737823074811836974">stanislav said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Eileen Critchley said...<br />Ok so we win the next election - tell me something I didn’t know!<br /><br />You don't know about pronouns, sweet thing; we never win the election, it is always they who win.<br /><br />Dave Thing will win, as you put it, just as Jock Three Salaries Salmond scraped-in here in Scotland - enough people were pissed off at his stuttering Lordship, the clown McConnell and his ScotLab municipal gangsters, all bent as nine-bob notes and voted for the Sean Connery Wife-beating Party of Salmond, of the doddering imbecile, Swinney, and the winsome, shitehawk lawyer, Nicola Moustache, now busy spreading C-Diff through Scotland's hospitals, as if they hadn't enough problems acting as pox clinics and drying-out centres for Mr McDelicious's homeless, alcoholic, workshy relations, bless their burdensome, beetle-browed, syphilitic, ginger heads.<br /><br />This revulsion at Labour has been spun by Porky Alec and the unspeakably stupid Scotch press as a victory for Nationalism, when, in fact, more people voted against the smirking little demagogue, than for him.<br /><br />Polish plumbers, however, well acquainted, historically, with the toxicity of Nationalist Socialist parties like the SNP, to a man, still voted for that same SNP because the alternative Labour/ToiletsParty coalition was even more worser, as English Literature graduates now say, after ten years of education-education-education, Blair-style.<br /><br />The same will happen here, Eilleen, should an election be permitted. A few will vote for the shape-shifting, shit-spouting blowhard, Dave oh-so-pretty-vacant Toff and his gang of pinstripe bankers, wankers, chisellers, lawyerbastards, thieves and degenerates; most, though, will vote against the walking dead of the Labour party. And the whole grim pantomime will start up again.<br /><br />Kiddie pornster and spokesperson of a generation, Mr Pete Nose of the 'oo is quoted here frequently -meet the new boss, same as the old boss...won't get fooled again et cet. And it's right enough. But for those, like Madam Critchley, suggesting that a game of musical chairs down Westminster is a victory for us, we Poles would suggest the words of the great Warsaw satirist, the late Mr Bill Hickski: Whoever you vote for the government always gets in. They win, we lose. We are the outsiders, peering in at matters too grave for our feeble minds, down on our knees, respect in our hearts, shit on our faces.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/labour-lose-deposit-lib-dems-make-no.html?showComment=1214566380000#c4737823074811836974" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">June 27, 2008 12:33 PM </span></a></span></dd></dl>Plumbers Assistanthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02799830542818857679noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1142220246378296886.post-23708096293700085092008-06-28T12:38:00.000-04:002008-06-30T18:39:54.529-04:00stanislav said... A statement issued on her behalf by Ms Alexander's plumber on the occasion of her resignation, this morning.<dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c8650309814912008200">stanislav said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>A statement issued on her behalf by Ms Alexander's plumber on the occasion of her resignation, this morning.<br /><br />"See youse, youse on the standards committee, youse is just a buncha sleekit wee basturds an' see the next leader of this great party, we'd just better hope that there's nae fucking aboot wi' all this donations shite, cos otherwise there'll be nay fucker willing tae take on the job, the noo, d'ye ken. An' it's only fucking money after all, Ah'm awa off tae ma brother see if he cannae get me a job in London, wi' all they other jocks.<br /><br />An' Ah'd just like to say the noo, that Ah'm no' resigning cos ah've done anything wrong, fuck me, no. It's just 'cos we couldnae get any other fucker to take the blame. See that Jackie Baillie, fuckin' shite she is, English bastard. Ah'll be awa' the noo and maybe get a peerage offa that big jessie, Gordon Broon, while he's still wearing his jacket the right way roond. Which willnae be too long Ah'm thinking, before he's wearing one a they ones wi' the arms tied up and all they straps and chains and things doon the side. Fuckin' mad bastard.<br /><br />Ah'm thinking that Ah've served the Labour Party very well in ma short term as leader; it is, the noo, well and truly fucked, although Ah cannae claim all the credit maself, everybody's done their wee bit but it's thanks tae me, Wendy McFishFace, that we'll nae be bothered wi' power for a very long time.<br /><br />We'll be passing the hat arroond the noo for ma holiday and we hope ye'll all be makkin large silent donations, as big as you can fucking manage, this time. No fucking aboot wi' all this just under a grand shite."</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/friday-caption-contest_27.html?showComment=1214653080000#c8650309814912008200" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">June 28, 2008 12:38 PM </span></a></span></dd></dl>Plumbers Assistanthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02799830542818857679noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1142220246378296886.post-16730458456155081542008-06-28T08:06:00.000-04:002008-06-29T19:42:29.168-04:00stanislav, a young polish plumber said... The Plumbers Guild cancelled it's Trannygraph subscription<dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c2417121240541615223">stanislav, a young polish plumber said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Those two trannies in the picture the other day, shuffling along the Embankment. The one at the back, in the stockings, that was Heffer and the one at the front was Janet Moustache, the American lady, the one with the thing for Punishment.<br /><br />They were being followed by a small troupe of fans led by Mr Simon Coulter from Spain, all wearing tee-shirts bearing statements such as: spot-on as usual, Mr Heffer; spot on as usual Mr Daley, spot on as usual Ms Parris; Way to Go, Mr Littlejohn, one man, straggling at the back, his tee-shirt said I love Jeremy Clarkson, spot-on, as usual, Mr Clarkson and they were all marching into the river.<br /><br />The Plumbers Guild cancelled it's Trannygraph subscription on the death of honourary plumber, Mr Auberon Waugh, the last great British journalist. The rest of them are cunts, every last fucking one of them, cunts. Utter fucking rubbish, good for fuck all, a fucking pollution; slags, ponces, arseholes.<br /><br />What kind of a pretend journalism would give house room to Peaches fucking Geldof, for fucks sake; Muriel Gray, Piers Moron, Toilets Maguire, Kneepads White, David Aaronobitch, Yasmin Alibi Muslim and that utterly obnoxious freak of nature, JoBoy Hari, the twittering lardman of the Independent.<br /><br />What kind of journalism, more importantly, would dance to the tune of the criminal Alistair Campbell, why didn't someone in the ridiculous lobby just punch this prick in the mouth, save a million lives. Or two.<br /><br />They will, the so-called quality press, all go the way of the Trannygraph and all these slags will be working, officially, for the heirs to the Murdoch pornography empire, not just moonlighting, like Sir Michael.<br /><br />The voices of the people, connected, skyped, g-mailed and blackberried across all the continents, unfiltered, bypassing the mush and drivel of the BBC are now heard here, in the vast quadrants of cyberspace. Fuck off Heffer, you horrible, sanctimonious, know-it-all, purple-faced degenerate and take your band of braindead groupies with you, useless, idle bastard.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/trouble-at-labourgraph.html?showComment=1214636760000#c2417121240541615223" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">June 28, 2008 8:06 AM </span></a></span></dd></dl>Plumbers Assistanthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02799830542818857679noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1142220246378296886.post-14111751711874633462008-06-27T03:14:00.001-04:002008-06-29T19:47:51.652-04:00stanislav said... Shame on us, not only did we lose the real war on Terror, we didn't even put up a fight.<dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c933084655844559303">stanislav said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>More TV reviews. Newsnight 26th June<br /><br />Congress in the US is - better late than never and maybe bouyed up by the iminent departure of the Evil Chimp - getting to grips with all this torture shit that Bush has authorised in Cuba.<br /><br />Newsnight showed tape of some fucking horrible, non-human bastard who is Cheney's Torture Boy in Chief, appearing before a Congressional committee; it was like watching Goering at Nuremberg.<br /><br />Even for the dumbest redneck asshole in America, this geezer spelled out just how corrupt, arrogant and - most of all - wicked is this Bush-Cheny-Haliburton administration and, by association, how vile it's major ally in the coalition of the warmongers - us, the UK.<br /><br />The Chairman of the Committe was, rightly, nearly choking, when he read from a CIA instruction book on waterboarding - "it is a matter of perception, whether this is torture or not, the body reacts to this procedure as though it was drowning, even though it is not; if the subject dies it means you have done it wrong" - the Chairman said, in so many words, you're shittin me, right ? waddayamean torture is a matter of perception ? how the fuck did we get here, where the US government is doing this shit to defenceless detainees in our custody ? The witness, confident of his immunity from prosecution, or if that failed his inevitable free pardon, told the chairman and all interlocutors to go fuck themselves.<br /><br />Our prime minister stands next to the instigator of these six-year long atrocities, squirming and simpering and calls him friend, calls him saviour.<br /><br />Torture, then, is a point on the presbyterian Brown's moral compass. Torture is one of his values. The use of torture is one of the right long-term decisions which he and his fellow sewer-dwellers are making, on our behalf.<br /><br />Down there in Hell, with all the other dead presbyterian ministers, Brown senior must be really feeling the heat of that poker up his arse. His freaky, nail-biting, snot-eating, gay son of the manse relishing, as he clearly does, the counsel and the company of torturers, war criminals, gangsters and degenerates, shying away from ordinary, decent people, from whom he knows he would receive scant approval, let alone comfort, from whom he would get short shrift, hear but the one blunt rejoinder, Come out Gordon and Fuck Off.<br /><br />And now this, even his Democrat chums in Washington and some Republicans, too, crying foul! Even as his own country shames and excoriates him, George Bush becomes Gordon Brown's new best friend.<br /><br />NewLabourNewTory, the party that -honestly misled by the dipsomaniac depressive, illiterate pornographer, Alistair Campbell - made torture respectable again.<br /><br />They know no shame, these people, neither Gordon the freak or Dave the worthless shapeshifting phony; Spelman, the bitch Alexander and her ill-featured ratspawn kin; the whole shithouse, filled with rank upon rank of chancers, thieves, ponces and perverts. Shame is not in their grubby repertoire of feigned emotions. But it should be in ours.<br /><br />Jack Straw, Tony Blair, Geoff Hoon, Michael Howard in particular, but nearly everyone in Westminster, save the toilets party, have endorsed the torturing to death of people captured, more or less at random,pulled off the streets and out of the fields by indiscriminate Pakistani bounty hunters.<br /><br />The shame is ours, that we have such dirty filthy people in power over us; the shame is ours that we are spun this way and that by mouthy morons who would put their grannies, their children on the game; that innocent, or even guilty people are drugged, hooded, chained, beaten, disorientated, deprived of sleep, assaulted by noise, terrorised by dogs, denied their lawyers, their families, their eligion, threatened with guns, sexually assaulted, humiliated and drowned by crewcut, smirking psychobastard flag-waving mommasboys is our shame, it is our shame, it is our shame. Our fathers hanged Nazis and Nips for this sort of thing.<br /><br />And this vile clumsy, clodhopping, inept, maladroit oaf, Gordon, stands before us, his lies evident from his uncontrollable twitching, his liar's jig, his body twisting, contorting against its own untruths, cudgelling us with tales of imminent Terror, as though Terror, thanks to him and his stooges, had not already successfully colonised, taken root and driven out our freedoms. Shame on us, not only did we lose the real war on Terror, we didn't even put up a fight.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/spelman-only-stopped-paying-nanny-when.html?showComment=1214532840000#c933084655844559303" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">June 27, 2008 3:14 AM </span></a></span></dd></dl>Plumbers Assistanthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02799830542818857679noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1142220246378296886.post-91857352338292764202008-06-26T13:05:00.000-04:002008-06-29T19:49:36.848-04:00rt. hon. mr jack torture, minister for obedience said...<dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c4074288475097145232">rt. hon. mr jack torture, minister for obedience said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>It is an honour to follow the honourable member for plumbers who is always pungent in his remarks to this place, I fear, however, that in this instance he wanders a little from his own discipline into that of others more qualified. I refer, of course, to the vexed question of criminal justice which is a rather more demanding subject than, shall we say, the replacement of a u-bend 'neath one's sink. Other ladies and gentlemen members of a more practical bent may have become aware, in their ownership of several properties, that such matters as these are easily remedied by the widely available white plastic plumbing fittings which require little skill in assembly although one must, to do justice to the traditions of this place, claim for the highest quality specialist professional services even if one cleared one's blocked sink with a bent coathanger. In this way is democracy served and the artisan thwarted. Too much, ladies and gentlemen, to my mind, is made of these dubious so-called practical skills of the lower orders and too little of the selfless profesionalism so freely deployed to the public good by right honourable and learned members, such as myself.<br /><br />But to move to the main thrust, Madam Deputy Spunker, of my remarks, I would like to propose that the experiment with rights, and let's face it, that is all it has been, has been a signal failure. It doesn't matter how many laws we enact - and God knows, we do try to keep 'em coming, so to speak, Madam Deputy Spanker - people simply keep on doing things against which we in this house have no legislative protection.<br /><br />No matter how many laws, how many emergecny provisions are passed - many only after much heart-searching by our rebel friends on the Labour back benches, rightly anxious of their peerages - it seems that we sinply cannot, by passing laws, contain, the criminality of the average voter.<br /><br />So serious has this situation become that not only are voters acting in ways which we have not yet made illegal but they are impudently attempting to use against US laws which we passed against THEM.<br /><br />I propose a simple solution which I am sure will find favour among all honourable and right honourable members. As I have mentioned, no matter how hard we try, by giving people a list of what they may not do, we leave it open to them to devise other, quite legal ways to make a nuisance of themselves, to the disservice of we in this house and our sponsors in the banks and the stock exchange. We are thus, Madam Deputy Splasher, looking down the wrong end of the telescope.<br /><br />Instead of telling people what they may not do we should simply tell them what they must do. Simple really, so simple that all these recent years we have missed it, even though it stares us in the face. What we must enact, most speedily and I am sure with the full support of all in this house, is a very simple piece of legislation which replaces all others and which states quite simply that people must, without queetion - and on pain of a visit from Sir Iain's gelled-up and macho Democracy-Enforcement Unit - do exactly as they told by those, that is to say us, who know better.<br /><br />In a proper, adult and mature democracy, Madam Deputy Whiplash, people simply must do as they are told. I so move.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/ironic-speech.html?showComment=1214481900000#c4074288475097145232" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">June 26, 2008 1:05 PM </span></a></span></dd></dl>Plumbers Assistanthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02799830542818857679noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1142220246378296886.post-9999832919058492112008-06-26T12:17:00.000-04:002008-06-29T19:54:19.658-04:00stanislav said... Tough on crime. Parliamentary scrutiny. Honourable members. Aye, right.<dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c1405883664399135620">stanislav said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Does this bleating prick make no connection between the activities of those whose knob he so thoruoghly decent chappishly sucks and those of the rat-faced poor? No corrolary between insritutionalised banditry in the elite and street crime in the poor ?<br /><br />Can he read, for instance, the previous posting in which it is revealed that his employers, friends, clients, masters have awarded themeselves an expenses increase of over two hundred per cent in ten years - the "realms of fantasy," so snortingly dismissed on Radio Government by the obnoxious cunt, MP Keith Purchase, now there's an ironic name for a thieving fucking bastard like him, who wants, demands everything for nothing, MPs are very special public employees, shouldn't have to be bothered by receipts, shouldn't have to pay for food, was the burden of his extraordinary, arrogant, thieving song. A shame the harpy at the Beeb didn't ask about HIS pension, still, giving him two bites at her cherry and Guido just one she will doubtless get herself a twittering book programme or a quiz to run, like good Beeboids do. How many programmes does John Farmer Humphries do, is it four, or five ?<br /><br />Do these fucking bastards in Mediaville, who now want to rearrange the way trials are conducted in order to ensure convictions of anyone, anyone, anyone deemed by Old Bill as Guilty before Trial, not realise what an example they set to those outside the charmed circle.<br /><br />Is this thoroughly decent arsehole really so fucking stupid that he doesn't realise that stealing from others, wrongly attacking and killing others and lying, lying, lying to wriggle out of responsibility have become the modus operandi of the burgeoning political caste he represents. It isn't just on here that people are contemptuous of party politics. Doesn't he realise what a remorselesly bad example he sets; speechwriter to the amoral, corrupt, warmongering, ruling cabal chides nasty street urchins. Fuck me it's like the eighteenth century round here.<br /><br />And no, fuck off, it wouldn't be any better under Lord Snooty. This is a Uni-party hegemony, just a matter of whose turn it is to shit in our faces and rearrange, for the greater good of themselves, our rights.<br /><br />Heard some braying tory oik last night, one of their screeching, Ministry of Injustice shadows, agreeing that those whom the police deem a priori guilty of violent crime, must, in the interests of justice, be denied a fair trial. There you are, the police say they are guilty, evrybody knows they are guilty so in the interests of justice we must frame them up, give 'em a fair trial in which they can't challenge the evidence against them because they don't know who's giving it and lock 'em up. Official Zanu-Tory policy. But subject to strict parliamentary regulation, you understand, the scrutiny of thieves, jusr like the expenses of Gorbals Mick.<br /><br />The more of these people get split lips the better because that's what it's like in the country they have created. Does this prat think criminals arrive from Mars or something. The "career politician" cares only for himself, his own advacement, his own wealth - these are implicit, inescapable, in the phrase "career politician." How dare they rebuke others, engaged in less salubrious forms of crime ?<br /><br />Tough on crime. Parliamentary scrutiny. Honourable members. Aye, right. As we say in Scotland. Up against the wall, motherfuckers, more like.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/ironic-speech.html?showComment=1214479020000#c1405883664399135620" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">June 26, 2008 12:17 PM </span></a></span></dd></dl>Plumbers Assistanthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02799830542818857679noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1142220246378296886.post-51891053081245088612008-06-24T13:18:00.000-04:002008-06-30T19:04:55.693-04:00debbie, pa to Mr Screwtape said... Special Offer! HellCo has introduced and exclusive line of Male Cosmeceuticals!<dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c9044150078128067197">debbie, pa to Mr Screwtape said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Dear Mr TaT<br />I can absolutely assure you that Mr Brown looks nothing whatever like Mr Satan. The Governor is most careful about his personal appearance - unlike some kaftan wearning deities we don't mention. Aside from a distinguished sprinkling of silver around the horns (which the ladies find most appealing) His Excellency has already been best described by Mr Jagger as: <i>a man of wealth and taste</i> looking very much like yourself, no doubt. Mr Screwtape, however, looks a little singed at the moment. I have sprayed him with aloe vera enriched CO2. It will grow back, eventually.<br /><br />Special Offer! HellCo has introduced and exclusive line of Male Cosmeceuticals to banish wrinkles, droops etc. For your free trial offer, ring our usual number and our HellCo representatives will come round to do the business. (Please specify preferred gender).</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/totalled.html?showComment=1214309880000#c9044150078128067197" title="comment permalink"> June 24, 2008 1:18 PM </a></span></dd></dl>Plumbers Assistanthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02799830542818857679noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1142220246378296886.post-14712465998136533632008-06-23T10:53:00.001-04:002008-06-30T18:59:37.120-04:00stanislav said... we have Northern Rock to pay for and all those PFI wallahs will need their beer money soon.<dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c7272266150255992446">stanislav said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Yes, Bob, it is the bankers, for whom Cesare and Lucretia Winterton, Tony and Imelda Blair and Darren and Tracy Balls perform a very useful function as lightning conductors; whilst shouting at their relatively minor nose-troughing we miss the worthies at the Lord Mayor's fucking Banquet -how so very 18th century- robbing us blind in virtually every transaction we make and then robbing us again to recover from their own mistakes, McBroon and McBadger covering their masters' backs at every cynical step, framing policy to ease the lives of the obscenely wealthy.<br /><br />Noses pressed up against the Dimbleby-screen, watching the revolting spectacle of the rich applauding themselves and their servants in government - as they forecast how hard it is going to be, for us but obviously not them - we almost invite the fucking up the arse they so kindly administer to us.<br /><br />Nose to the grindstone, lads, shoulders to the wheel; we have Northern Rock to pay for and all those PFI wallahs will need their beer money soon. And all the early retirees on public sector pensions, they need keeping in Saga-luxury. The premier himself has set the tone, work day and night, doesn't matter if you do everything wrong, just be good, fuck-witted presbyterians.<br /><br />Harder work for less wages. British vaaahl-ewes. And remember, this coming winter, wear lots of woollies and walk to work. Remember what's good for the bankers is good for you, it is they and not you who create the wealth, all of it, every fucking penny.<br /><br />And remember, also, as Debbie, PA to Mr Screwtape sagely remarks, the bankers carefully look after your money as if it was their own. Because it is.<br /><br />The Tory Bankers party, the Labour Bankers Party or the Toilet Bankers party; you pays, as they say, your money and you takes your choice. Not that, thanks to Channel Dimbleby, there is one.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/despair-force-one-lands-in-jeddah-pump.html?showComment=1214214780000#c7272266150255992446" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">June 23, 2008 10:53 AM </span></a></span></dd></dl>Plumbers Assistanthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02799830542818857679noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1142220246378296886.post-70551974682175726492008-06-22T22:04:00.001-04:002008-06-30T19:01:49.764-04:00stanislav said... Triumphant Fisting Premier Returns from Saudi.<dl id="comments-block"><dt style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c5072298115272835082">stanislav said... </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>From the Dail Mirror<br /><br />Triumphant Fisting Premier Returns from Saudi.<br /><br />by Toilets Maguire.<br /><br />As premier Brown descended the steps of his aircraft today he made the following statement to assembled journalists:<br /><br />"I have here in my chewed-to-bits hand a piece of paper bearing my signature and that of Herr Ali Baba, guaranteeing Oil in our time, well some of the time, anyway. If they let us have some oil we will give them the bits of Britain not already owned by themselves and our very good Russian friends.<br /><br />It is, in my judgement, in the best long-term interests of hard-working British families that they learn to walk from home to work. If they have any jobs to go to. And any homes. Herr Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves and I have had useful and productive and meaningful discussions. (trans. he called me a cunt). The humiliation of the UK is, I must stress, not an event, but a process.<br /><br />Times are hard - none of my fault - and it is only by taking the right, tough decisions, like these, that I can remain prime minister for a bit longer."</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/sunday-sleaze.html?showComment=1214168640000#c5072298115272835082" title="comment permalink"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">June 22, 2008 10:04 PM</span></a><span class="item-control blog-admin pid-1151433915"><a href="http://www.blogger.com/delete-comment.g?blogID=8212152&postID=5072298115272835082" title="Delete Comment"> </a> </span> </span> </dd><dt class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c2508962645862202812"> <a name="c2508962645862202812"></a><br /></dt></dl>Plumbers Assistanthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02799830542818857679noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1142220246378296886.post-8907933050619031352008-06-14T11:57:00.003-04:002008-06-15T08:19:07.633-04:00stanislav, a young polish plumber said...The BBC, Dingleberry(s) and other trichofaecolith<dl id="comments-block"><dt class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c5845286485902808810"><span style="font-weight: bold;"> stanislav, a young polish plumber said...</span> </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>The role of the Corpoation is to educate and inform, who mentioned brainwashing ?<br /><br /><br />Like the late George Best, Nigel Kennedy is an erratic genius, a British virtuoso, a maestro as accomplished and creative in Johannes Sebastian Bach as in James Marshall Hendrix.<br /><br />Genuinely perplexed at how freedom is being beasted, here, in Elgarland, happy to step outside his own area of expertise, raise his own unpolished, non-broadcasterly voice in protest, a precious flower, unshaven and dishevelled as, often, are the truly Godly and some fuckwit on Jock Neil's, tedious, self-congatulatory rubbish programme, takes a man who can fill auditoria all over the globe and sets him down on the sofa with the most ignorant,obnoxious, venal, corrupting, rabble-rousing, useless, mouthy fuckpig in British media; a lardy, gabshite, frothing, drunken cunt, long overdue a heart attack, proud of his part in degrading the standard of public discourse, a complete fucking gross embarrassment not just to the nation but to humanity. Kelvin McCunt, like Jock himself, enriched by chewing on Rupert Murdoch's foreskin, getting the little hard bits out from round Rupe's poxed-up, cancerous, Aussie arsehole, whilst casting himself ludicrously, as Everyman, as John Bull, the fucking horrible bastard.<br /><br />Jesus fucking wept. We don't produce too many proper world class artists but Kennedy, for all his punk affectation, is one of them; obviously it counts for nothing with the ill-mannered cocksucker, McCunt, and less with Jock, happier taking the political temperature with raucous, braying chums more of his own calibre, Peter Stringfellow, Ross Kemp - the fearless East End warrior, beaten up by his Mrs, Rebekka Wade - and fellow Murdochite, Kelvin. Kennedy's people need sacking.<br /><br />When he was driving the Jocksman into the ground, up in bonny Edinburgh, Neil employed people to clear the poor from his path, can't stand the poor, y'see, being filthy rich; everyone, espouses Neil, can suck the Murdoch knob and walk away with millions in shares.<br /><br /><br />Warren Beatty made a memorable assault on political tv journalists in an under-rated film, Bullman, I think, in which an eccentric Presidential candidate on one of those phoney US TV debate programmes, says, effectively, c'mon, gentlemen, this is bullshit, isn't it, you are a load of middle-aged, white millionaires asking us load of middle-aged white millionaires a load of bullshit questions, nothing happening here tonight, nothing to see here, just a load of rich people, bullshitting; rather like the BBC<br /><br />For that is Neil and his stooges; just a load of rich people, bullshitting; Jock Neil, already fabulously wealthy, extracting every last halfpenny from the licensepayer. Look at me, aren't I clever, he smirks, grinding out his lame jokes, feigning affinity with the citizen, as Joe Public, watching at home, wipes the latest shit-barrage from his face.<br /><br />The Thalidomide expose, forty years ago, was a good scoop by Neil at the Sunday Times but it doesn't mean he has to dominate the public service broadcaster until he fucking well dies in the arms of some nightclub totty, a quarter his age. Is there really no-one else, less smirky, less embedded in the celebrity circuit, more courageous, better informed, less, how shall we say, showbiz? Jock Neil should get a BAFTA, for light entertainment, that's what he is, that's what he does.<br /><br />And as for Kelvin McCunt and the BBC, no-one at the Corporation has yet raised the propriety of this bulging, redfaced, racist oaf being funded by a US citizen in a UK election Are there no issues of principle here (no point raising questions of legality when talking of Mark Thompson's boys and girls) why have the self-fallating Mr Robinson and the ludicrous twittering caricature Mr Paxman not raised this most obvious concern ? Can any foreign media mogul launch his candidates in our election ? The principle is clearly up for debate and would be even if Billy Bunter McCunt wasn't a repulsive nutter. One thing for Jock Three Pensions Salmond, up in his pretend government Edinburgh to appoint Donald Trump his Minister for Local Democracy but do we want the shitbag Murdoch putting up candidates, here, backed with millions of his untaxed pounds. BBC's missed this one, anxious as it is to rubbish Basher Davies and Naughty, Selfish, Unco-operative Paddy<br /><br />From the instant that the Irish answer became apparent the BBC has shamelessly spun it as both perverse and anti-democratic, so predictable that it has almost been comforting to see its giants of journalism spewing out exactly what they are told Propaganda Central.<br /><br />Google, friends, Guido's archive for Dennis on the TV license, they can't touch you, they can't come into your house, these ogres off the TV advert are a private company, fuck 'em. Paying the license tax to an organisation which is so evidently an enemy of the people is an act at best of irresponsibility and at worst of treachery. This ain't Jackanory, this is the wealthy, self-protecting, unaccountable, insidiously fascist media de nos jours. And fuck the Sun, too.<br /><br /><br />love from stanislav</p> </dd><dd style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/bbc-reporting-insults-irish-democracy.html?showComment=1213441020000#c5845286485902808810" title="comment permalink"> June 14, 2008 11:57 AM</a></span></dd></dl><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt class="comment-author blogger-comment-icon" id="c8494157288407517685"><a style="font-weight: bold;" href="http://www.blogger.com/profile/15984396354633891857" rel="nofollow">Dennis</a><span style="font-weight: bold;"> said...</span> </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>The BBC used to be a great institution. No longer.<br /><br />It depends for its income largely on the licence fee. You must pay them £139.50 a year if you receive real-time TV broadcasts of any description, whether from them or anybody else.<br /><br />Curiously enough, this itself is in contravention of the European Convention on Human Rights: the BBC is interfering with your right to receive information. So far, despite a couple of low-profile cases, nothing has been done about this. Possibly some private, quid pro quo, arrangement is in force between the BBC and the European Commission -- who knows? It would certainly explain the BBC's hysterically pro-Europe bias.<br /><br />Anyhoo, the simple answer to the BBC's shite is simply not to pay the telly tax. It's quite easy to do. Full info at www.tvlicensing.biz.<br /><br />If you want to stay legal, the best option is to get rid of your set. Try it -- it's wonderfully liberating!<br /><br />P.S. Stan -- "the little hard bits [out from round Rupe's poxed-up, cancerous, Aussie arsehole]" ... for future reference, the term is "dingleberries".<br /><br />P.P.S. Stan -- if you got rid of your telly you would be spared the sight of such rabid, fat, arrogant slimeballs as Kelvin "His Master's Voice" McKenzie.</p> </dd><dd style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/bbc-reporting-insults-irish-democracy.html?showComment=1213449780000#c8494157288407517685" title="comment permalink"> June 14, 2008 2:23 PM</a></span></dd></dl><br /><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c8727979746384841429"><span style="font-weight: bold;"> stanislav, a young polish plumber said...</span> </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Dear Mr Dennis<br /><br />Thank you for your kind reproof, which I have considered carefully. With regard to the terminology of Mr McKenzie's career in faeces consumption, dingleberry is, by now, almost arcane and probably incomprehensible to many of order-order's global audience; people in Florida, say, would be saying Dingleberry ? what is this Dingleberry shit ? The Frog would shrug and say Deengle - barree, is like Rosbif, no ? The congregants of O-O who worship here, you see, come not just from the esteemed Crippled Bellringers Guild, the Hazel Dwarf Appreciation Society or the Polish Plumbers Federation; some of them are quite foreign.<br /><br />Secondly, as to the television, if you can persuade Mrs stanislav that life continueth, even more fruitfully, beyond the Repeated and Learnt by Heart Adventures of Hercule Poirot and beyond Gardeners World of Freak Presenters I will be even more indebted to you than I am currently. Oftentimes I have denuded the house of all television receivers and do delight in their absence; like a plague of locusts, however, they swarm back in and as you will know, once in, they are watched. They are in every wing of the house and virtually unavoidable. For my part it is only the current affairs, or rolling news which I watch, foul-mouthed, sipping from my cocktail of scepticism, mistrust and unalloyed hatred for journalists, especially those at the BBC, whose license-tax, thanks to your own kind offices, I am saving in order that it be shoved, flaming, up lord Levy's arse, should the happy day of his prosecution ever dawn.<br /><br />You have never, incidentally, satisfactorily, or in any other fashion, explained your recent, long absence; if it was occasioned by surgery upon your spinal excrescence one hopes that it was successful and that all that remains before your re-entry to decent society is a resolution of that little epidermal problem. B&Q, I understand, now sell palm-sanders quite reasonably, a quick rub over with one of which, before leaving home, might prevent you having your usual impact upon children, the faint-hearted and the elderly.<br /><br /><br />I remain your humble, affectionate servant and, should circumstances beckon, plumber.</p> </dd><dd style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/bbc-reporting-insults-irish-democracy.html?showComment=1213453680000#c8727979746384841429" title="comment permalink"> June 14, 2008 3:28 PM</a></span></dd></dl><dl id="comments-block"><dt class="comment-author blogger-comment-icon" id="c7960110626531180437"><a style="font-weight: bold;" href="http://www.blogger.com/profile/15984396354633891857" rel="nofollow">Dennis</a><span style="font-weight: bold;"> said...</span> </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Dear Stan<br /><br />Thank you for your kind words of enquiry: I was involved in an accident on my trike (my lopsidedness prevents me from riding a bicycle) but have now recovered, no thanks to a certain ginger-haired dwarf, who visited me not, nor did she send flowers, grapes, pornographic magazines, Tanqueray gin, or other desiderata for the convalescent.<br /><br />I see no reason for dumbing-down. The use of the term "dingleberry" should be more widespread, as there are so many of them around. Mr E. Balls, for example.<br /><br />Did you know that there are only two objects in the English language which have exact synonyms? These are "gorse" and "furze", and "dingleberry" and "griffnut".<br /><br />(An aside to Mr Testicles: I always thought a "winnit" was an exceptionally tiny turdlet rather than a globular accretion of hair and dried excrement, but I am ready be to corrected on this point. My usual authority, Dr Skeat, in silent on this matter.)<br /><br />As for the TV sets, why not just paste on a tea-chest an A4 photograph, landscape-fashion, of Noel Edmonds for Mrs Stanislav to look at? You can then dipose of the offending items and she will be none the wiser, such is the mentality of females.<br /><br />Your professional advice on the question of sanders is most interesting and, weather permitting, I will pedal down to B&Q tomorrow to investigate.<br /><br />I am much obliged to you.<br /><br />Yours truly<br /><br /><i>Dennis</i></p> </dd><dd style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/bbc-reporting-insults-irish-democracy.html?showComment=1213459620000#c7960110626531180437" title="comment permalink"> June 14, 2008 5:07 PM</a></span></dd></dl><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt class="comment-author blogger-comment-icon" id="c1257362470856081702"><a style="font-weight: bold;" href="http://www.blogger.com/profile/15984396354633891857" rel="nofollow">Dennis</a><span style="font-weight: bold;"> said...</span> </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Abu Tap Dass<br /><br />The New Recognised Word Is<br /><br />Ratsniffer<br /><br />Vertically Challenged, Differently White Young Person of Afro-Caribbean Ethnicity<br /><br />Cap'n Haddock<br /><br />Gentlemen, thank you for your learned contributions to my education. However, I still think Stan should not shrink from using the correct word when the occasion demands it. How otherwise can foreigners, such as Senor Barroso (a fine example of the object in question), be expected to learn English?</p> </dd><dd style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/bbc-reporting-insults-irish-democracy.html?showComment=1213474800000#c1257362470856081702" title="comment permalink"> June 14, 2008 9:20 PM</a></span></dd></dl><dl id="comments-block"><dt class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c5802768874988642050"><span style="font-weight: bold;"> Cassandra said...</span> </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Entertaining as the the learned debate about trichofaecoliths may be, can anyone answer Stanislav's question about the legality of a British parliamentary election candidate being bank-rolled by a US/Australian citizen?</p> </dd><dd style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/bbc-reporting-insults-irish-democracy.html?showComment=1213479360000#c5802768874988642050" title="comment permalink"> June 14, 2008 10:36 PM</a></span></dd></dl><br /><dl id="comments-block"><dt class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c2926412463044157983"><span style="font-weight: bold;"> stanislav, a young polish blumber said...</span> </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Dear Mr Mrs Cassandra<br /><br />Does seem to have been submerged a little in the tide of discord surrounding the matter of anal hygiene. Since first posting the question the repeat of the dire Any Pointless Questions has been broadcast and the Right Reverend Julia Beefburger, herself a member of the Copraphliacs for Proportional<br />Representation Party - and by the way, should not the items in question become known, appositely, as Cleggies - but, as usual I digress - RAbbi Beefburger, in any event, did at least raise the query about Murdoch and Kelvin McCunt, but none on the distinguished panel picked it up and ran with it, maybe, like Gove, MP, and Parris they all work for Rupe in one way or another. In a week of bizarre events this is the most startling - that this idea can be even mooted without raising widespread consternation among the twitterati; maybe those of the little darlings who go back to work on Monday will raise it in the House, only not Mr Gove, obviously, a man who should surely, in the light of all this, be considering his own position; leaving aside the fact that he shouldn't have a second job at all, can he draw a handsome salary from a man who is funding a candidate opposing his fellow Conservative, Mr Basher Davies ? If Mr Gove were ever to just shut the fuck up for a couple of minutes he might, like the rest of us, see what a cunt he looks.</p> </dd><dd style="font-weight: bold;" class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/bbc-reporting-insults-irish-democracy.html?showComment=1213488720000#c2926412463044157983" title="comment permalink"> June 15, 2008 1:12 AM</a></span></dd></dl>Plumbers Assistanthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02799830542818857679noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1142220246378296886.post-66696056374311937942008-06-10T15:49:00.000-04:002008-06-10T21:28:24.766-04:00stanislav, a young polish plumber said...Gordon Brown on Arms and the Man.<dl id="comments-block"><dt class="comment-author anon-comment-icon" id="c4682964665737126972"><span style="font-weight: bold;"> stanislav, a young polish plumber said...</span> </dt><dd class="comment-body"> <p>Anonymous said...<br />Your blog is getting boring Guido. Where the fuck is that Scotch legendary hero McTwat? Does anybody know?<br /><br />June 10, 2008 2:49 PM<br /><br /><br />He appears in this brief aide memoire, below.<br /><br /><br /><br />Gordon Brown on Arms and the Man.<br /><br />Those made hospital-sick by starvation rations and cruel treatment were singled-out by their gallant and noble captors. Men with crippling dysentery, unable to labour further under the knotted rope-ends of ignorant, vicious Japanese peasant-soldiers had their bodies and faces slashed with bamboo canes; thirsty, hungry, bleeding and diseased, they were repeatedly kicked and jumped upon, cruelly used by their jovial Bushido warrior custodians, beaten half to death. Some were honoured, obscenely, with a ritual beheading into a moist jungle grave; some, despite their comrades' pleadings, were buried alive.<br /><br />It is said that for every sleeper laid on the infamous Burma-Siam railroad an Allied POW died, from starvation, thirst, beatings, neglect, torture; sick, emaciated, choleric, defenceless soldiers, flogged, battered and beheaded by those with whom, in the words of the UK prime minister last week,<br /><br />"we have enjoyed a one hundred and fifty year diplomatic relationship. "<br /><br />To Don't mention the debt mountain, Don't mention the bent donors, Don't mention Northern Rock, Don't mention l'holocaust de nos jours in Iraq, to Don't mention the snot-eating, Gordon Brown, MP, now adds Hush, child, Don't mention the war.<br /><br />It is all a long time ago and even those who were there, distressed by their memory, recoiled from speaking of it. A few scapegoated monsters were hanged but there's not much can be done for veterans, survivors of such sustained, enculturated, depraved barbarity and that, of course - not much - is exactly what the UK political caste, ever busy enriching itself and its families, setting itself ever further beyond the law, has done, these last sixty years. Less than not much is what Gordon Brown, cowardly, shameless warmonger, did, last week.<br /><br />Like most of his bumbling, sticky-fingered crew, Gordon Brown has never had a proper job, let alone worn a uniform; a period of extended studentship, a dalliance with the BBC and thereafter Gordon has been kept by the subscribers to the Labour party, the taxpayer, by wealthy donors and associates seeking favour and advancement.<br /><br />Notably - until the shame grew overwhelming in the light of the first of many unpunished Mandelson offences - Gordon Brown was the kept man of the revolting Gigolo Geoff Robinson, Brown's "office" funded by Geoff's spoils from his lucrative, old widow liason; apartments rented and dinners bought from Geoff's overseas bank accounts; Robinson, as well as being generous to every hustler in the NewLabour brothel, was, coincidentally, the only person Brown, in power, could find to fill the office of Paymaster General but as we saw with Mandy, Geoff, Gordon, Tony and Imelda, 'tis a terrible thing when thieves fall out, doubly so when Secretary Mandy is responsible for investigating the conduct of Robinson, a man who had bunged him a trifling, easily forgotten, third of a million pounds.<br /><br />Gordon Brown, though he would deny them thrice, has since found other dodgy sources of funding, whilst for more than ten years sermonising to us with increasingly fevered bombast on the right thing and on values and on vision. His right thing, his values and his vision the only possible prescription for all the ills and sins of the World, his moral compass the only one properly calibrated; his malign, preachy, pushy father; his hothouse schooldays, his obsessive ambition, his bizarre and unnatural, stagey, late middle-aged parenthood, his lifelong bullying, his dishonest, plotting, conniving, secretive, paranoid, sexually repressed, presbyterian freakishness all spun, preposterously, as evidence of average guy normalcy. Hush, child, he is not their grand-daddy, he's their daddy.<br /><br />Gordon Brown's is a terrible, cataclysmic narcissism which dooms to shabby ruination not just his own bloated, self-aggrandising and adolescent folies de grandeur but the entire nation, all of us, the unvalued war dead, the cheated war wounded; the neglected, extorted dying, their houses appropriated to pay for Mr and Mrs Balls' second home; the living, hectored, barracked, moralised to by Blair GrannyBabes like Hodge and Jowell, yes, and the QueenGrannyBabe herself, Imelda Blair, the thieving, insatiably money-grubbing baggage; the unborn, both experimented-upon and carelessly extinguished. Brown's life-long mental disorders threaten us all.<br /><br /><br />As with most of his pampered, faux socialist ilk, Gordon Brown's right thing, when it comes to Tommy, is to send him, ill-equipped and underpaid, to fight US gangster capitalism's bandit wars; to get his arse shot off and lie in some shithole hospital, unvisited, unrecognised, chivvied and cheated by moral Titans, like Bob Ainsworth and his boss, Des Jock Browne, the dynamic Brownite duo from the Ministry of Cut-Price Defeat, a pair of over-elevated career cowards who would - Ainsworth a depressingly vulgar, trade union punk and Browne a Glasgow lawyer in a cheap suit - stifle all criticism, even that from HM Coroner.<br /><br />Brown's contempt for the simple courage of ordinary blokes flashes neon bright in his appointment of Browne - in a time of massive, dangerous, full-time UK military commitment - as part-time Secretary of Defence. Browne's feeble, nit-picking intellect would see him struggling with anything requiring more than the bully's odious skills, that he is charged with coralling a rebellious Scotland whilst overseeing our participation in two conflicts at the other side of the world is a testament not to his meagre abilities, but to his master's contempt for those who really do serve.<br /><br />The Jap atrocities do date, in truth, from a long time ago but some survivors live still. We can guess what they made of Gordon Brown's hundred and fifty year diplomatic history remarks, being enslaved, starved, beaten, bayonetted and buried alive is a peculiar form of diplomacy, perhaps; beheading lawful prisoners of war not exactly an entente cordiale.<br /><br />Gordon Brown, though, in squeaky tandem with the Jap premier, lays such ghosts; they, Brown and Fukuda, fanatical incompetents both, have right decisions to make in the long-term interests of hard-working British and Japanese families as they are buffeted by the effects of the American credit crunch and by global economic turbulence. Hush, child, don't mention the repossessions.<br /><br />Gordon Brown, son of a bullying, censorious clergyman and a bullying, censorious coward himself, flees, shredding his nails, his bowels a-flutter, from any sign of trouble; you wouldn't want him in your fox-hole or your lifeboat. Gordon Brown thinks that if he doesn't mention something it has ceased to exist; that if he does something it can only be the right thing; stealing our liberties, our money, our identity, even our history, Gordon is doing these things and they are, quad erat demonstrandum, the right thing. The impudent Blair claimed he would never do anything wrong; the deranged Brown, from within his Fuhrer complex, insists that his every ruinous, imbecilic, catastrophic misjudgement is right. He was born to be right. Hush, child, don't mention the economy.<br /><br />With HM Forces operating in two theatres it would not have been amiss for Gordon Brown to have said to his Japanese counterpart, just for instance, Terrible things happened to our servicemen, but now we are friends and partners; he might even have said, We had the horrors of Japanese mistreatment of our men and you had the horrors of Hirsohima and Nagasaki, Sorrow and Shame have been companions to us both, thus mitigating any possible offence while publicly acknowledging the suffering and sacrifice of men now in their eighties and nineties - and, by extension, commending those serving currently, to vaguer purpose.<br /><br />Gordon, though, his own gilded, pampered, charmed, idler's path fought for and cleared by tortured-to-death or now-tired, old Tommies, is far too cowardly for that and proferred, instead, a revisionist history; our continuing one hundred and fifty year accord with the Nip almost a testament to his own powers, his own values, learnt in the manse. Hush child, don't mention history, history is whatever Uncle Gordon wants it to be.<br /><br />Here is a bizarre figure; grinning his bleachy grin, he welcomed the Chinese secret service thugs shoving him around in his own frontyard but like a big girly shied away from touching the torch they displayed, I'm not touching that big thing; he signed the Lisbon Treaty but deliberately arrived late, as if doing it after everyone else had gone wasn't really doing it at all; it isn't really a treaty at all, just a wee bit of paperwork, nothing really, see, I am doing the right thing. As always. Hush, child, don't mention the referendum.<br /><br />Throughout the 'thirties and into the 'forties Japan launched an imperialistic blitzkrieg all over the Pacific and waged a cruel, savage war against all in its path, allied to and exending the domination of the Jew-gassing, fascist master race, Japan's hideous, Samurai hoodlum bullshit was deployed without conscience against babies, women, children and prisoners of war. Hush, child, don't mention the bayonets.<br /><br /><br />To see Gordon Brown stand in 10 Downing Street, in the crumpled cloth of serial cowardice and back-stabbing treachery, flashing his sick, bleached, paranoia demons' smile; his monsterclaw of compulsive emphasis, rat-a-tat-tatting on the lectern with a spastic life of its own; over-medicated, gulping, charmless, stuttering his clapped-out, delusional junkyard mantra and describe our relationship with this nation, Japan, as a one hundred and fifty year diplomatic accord is a sight to chill the blood.<br /><br />In taking the right decisions for the long-term interests of hard-working British families, Gordon Brown now even decides what is in history and what is inconvenient. Ich bin eine dish of sushi.<br /><br /><br />Jack and Tom were Yorkshire mates. Jack finished the war liberating, if that's the word, the Nazi-Axis death camps as part of the RAMC; Tom, emaciated, broken and terrified, flew home from the Far East in the belly of a bomber; both were decent, ordinary Labour party voters; not, for them, medals and parades, not for them high office and baubles in the Westminster dignitaries whorehouse; just a family struggle to make ends meet in the austere fifties, bring the kids up decent. Age did not weary them, nor the years condemn for Death arrived early, summoned, maybe, by their service in arms to their country, their dreams grotesque, their bodies and spirits plundered of health and vigour and optimism.<br /><br /><br />Their memory then and their service, airbrushed away for a soundbite; their nation now subsumed by ruse and dodge and artifice into a subjugated, tyrannised by consumerism, neo-socialist reich which they fought to oppose. In the morning and in the evening and at the going down of the Sun, Gordon, we may be sure, will not remember them. Hush, child, the prime minister is listening to voices in his head.<br /><br />Despite his wheezing, discordant choir of praise-singers in cabinet, at the BBC and in the school magazine that is the Rusbridger Guardian, mad dreams must plague him, dreams of no return, waking in the early dawn; his cheating heart, his chiselling ambition brings not longed-for, Kennedyesque stature and glamour and flattery and compliment but derision, insult, affront, contempt, slur and slander; no jibe too cheap, no innuendo too far-fetched, no mockery too cruel as his bright, shiny ambition, realised, alas, far too late, rusts swiftly before his rheumy eye.<br /><br />The man with no nails, the man with no choices, the man with no money, the man with no hope, his fatuous cliches rejected, his flaws derided, his candidates humiliated, his books remaindered, his rocking horse cavalry hamstrung and gutshot.<br /><br />What we need, of course - and bugger the braying, barrowboy, Tory oiks and their larcenous spawn, all revealed afresh as ever-thieving, whoremongering spivs, led by worthless, arrogant, public school hooligans - is a spontaneous general strike, a mutiny, a downing of tools and arms, a withholding of taxes until we are delivered a referendum and a general election which should sweep away the scum of every shabby political hue and instal, instead, an avenging regiment of genuine no-quarter independents. What we need is Up against the wall, motherfuckerism. Cowards, thieves, spivs, demagogues, charlatans, ponces, pimps and whores; Labour, Tory or the Cleggies, doesn't matter a shit, that's what they are, that, egged on by the reptiles in the press, is what they do. How long can it be before we hear them cry, You! the one good apple left in here, you spoil it for all us bad apples.<br /><br />And, for now, at the top of the shitpile, Gordon Brown, besieged by failure, scandal, corruption and incompetence, your country doesn't want you, your stooges and lackeys and maids and minders in parliament don't want you; your bankrupt, deserted party doesn't want you, even your presbyterian Jock fatherland - and Scotland, God knows, accepts the most worthless, throwaway rubbish as entertainers, artists, sportspersons, journalists and politicians - doesn't want you.<br /><br />A ranting, bad-tempered, unstable, maladjusted, non-legitimised and loathed despot, everything you touch turns to shit, everyone you champion stumbles. People with no axe to grind writhe in embarrassment at your lies, your blameshifting evasions, as though daily, after eleven years as head of UK domestic policy, you are confronted by fresh Thatcher depradations, as though while you are lifting every child into debt or imprisonment or illiteracy the historic policies of Nigel Lawson or Keith Joseph snap malevolently at your reforming ankles.<br /><br />You are the Four Horsepersons of National Apocalypse, meshed and melded into one gibbering, spluttering fool; a pasty, jowly, repulsive, aged clown, no bright young thing, you, but a mug, suckered by your predecessor into being his fall guy, his lightning conductor, his dummy. Never mind re-writing and sanitising history, try doing just one good, uncalculated, unselfich deed before you die and in the name of God, come out, Gordon, and then, handsomely rewarded for your life of utter madness, fuck off.</p> </dd><dd class="comment-footer"> <span class="comment-timestamp"> <a style="font-weight: bold;" href="http://www.order-order.com/2008/06/who-could-succeed-spelman.html?showComment=1213109340000#c4682964665737126972" title="comment permalink"> June 10, 2008 3:49 PM</a><span class="item-control blog-admin pid-1151433915"><a href="http://www.blogger.com/delete-comment.g?blogID=8212152&postID=4682964665737126972" title="Delete Comment"> </a> </span> </span> </dd><dt class="comment-author blogger-comment-icon" id="c5225906777379343712"> <a name="c5225906777379343712"></a> <a href="http://www.blogger.com/profile/07717221243582686766" rel="nofollow"></a></dt></dl>Plumbers Assistanthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02799830542818857679noreply@blogger.com0